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An associate producer is the only guy in Hollywood who will associate with a producer.

Fred Allen

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Fred Allen
Age: 61 †
Born: 1894
Born: May 31
Died: 1956
Died: March 17
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Cambridge
Massachusetts
John Florence Sullivan
Entertainment
Hollywood
Humor
Comedy
Guy
Associate
Funny
Associates
Art
Producer
Producers

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He's so small, he's a waste of skin.
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A human being is nothing but a story with skin around it.
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California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange.
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On ships they call them barnacles in business they attach themselves to desks and are called vice presidents.
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I'm going to Boston to see my doctor. He's a very sick man.
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A celebrity is a person who works hard all of their life to become well known, and then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.
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You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a fruit fly and still have room enough for three caraway seeds and a producer's heart.
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Hush, little bright line, don’t you cry You’ll be a cliché by and by.
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Ed Sullivan will be around as long as someone else has talent.
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Radio is called a medium because it is rare that anything is well done.
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It is bad to suppress laughter. It goes back down and spreads to your hips.
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An income tax form is like a laundry list - either way you lose your shirt.
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Imitation is the sincerest form of television.
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When Jack Benny plays the violin, it sounds as though the strings are still in the cat.
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My father never raised his hand to any one of his children, except in self-defense.
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What's on your mind, if you will allow the overstatement.
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My uncle is a Southern planter. He's an undertaker in Alabama.
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The S.S. Sierra was a ten-thousand-ton vessel. Today, lifeboats bigger than the Sierra are found on the Queen Mary and other luxury liners.
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Most of us spend the first six days of each week sowing wild oats then we go to church on Sunday and pray for a crop failure.
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Washington is no place for a good actor. The competition from bad actors is too great.
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