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A committee is a group of the unprepared, appointed by the unwilling to do the unnecessary.

Fred Allen

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Fred Allen
Age: 61 †
Born: 1894
Born: May 31
Died: 1956
Died: March 17
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Cambridge
Massachusetts
John Florence Sullivan
Funny
Appointed
Work
Committee
Unwilling
Committees
Unnecessary
Group
Groups
Humor
Unprepared

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A celebrity is a person who works hard all of their life to become well known, and then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.
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The first time I sang in the church choir two hundred people changed their religion.
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Father Time is the make-up man responsible for the physical changes that determine the parts the average actor is to play.
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The S.S. Sierra was a ten-thousand-ton vessel. Today, lifeboats bigger than the Sierra are found on the Queen Mary and other luxury liners.
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I'm going to Boston to see my doctor. He's a very sick man.
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It is bad to suppress laughter. It goes back down and spreads to your hips.
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An associate producer is the only guy in Hollywood who will associate with a producer.
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What's on your mind, if you will allow the overstatement.
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Hollywood is a great place if you're an orange.
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Imitation is the sincerest form of television.
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An advertising agency is 85 percent confusion and 15 percent commission.
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He's so small, he's a waste of skin.
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My father never raised his hand to any one of his children, except in self-defense.
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Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in church. They're afraid God might recognize them and ask for autographs.
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Television is a medium because anything well done is rare.
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Cocktail party: A gathering held to enable forty people to talk about themselves at the same time. The man who remains after the liquor is gone is the host.
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An income tax form is like a laundry list - either way you lose your shirt.
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Television is the triumph of machine over people.
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