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An advertising agency is 85 percent confusion and 15 percent commission.
Fred Allen
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Fred Allen
Age: 61 †
Born: 1894
Born: May 31
Died: 1956
Died: March 17
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Cambridge
Massachusetts
John Florence Sullivan
Commission
Agency
Confusion
Advertising
Percent
Comedy
Business
Adverts
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The first time I sang in the church choir two hundred people changed their religion.
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English coffee tastes like water that has been squeezed out of a wet sleeve.
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Life, in my estimation, is a biological misadventure that we terminate on the shoulders of six strange men whose only objective is to make a hole in one with you.
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A human being is nothing but a story with skin around it.
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What's on your mind, if you will allow the overstatement.
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All I know about humor is that I don't know anything about it.
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He's so small, he's a waste of skin.
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Father Time is the make-up man responsible for the physical changes that determine the parts the average actor is to play.
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Washington is no place for a good actor. The competition from bad actors is too great.
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Ed Sullivan will be around as long as someone else has talent.
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My agent gets 10 percent of everything I get, except the blinding headaches.
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Everywhere outside New York City is Bridgeport, Connecticut.
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A psychiatrists is the next man you start talking to after you start talking to yourself.
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Television is a triumph of equipment over people.
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