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I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

Fred Allen

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Fred Allen
Age: 61 †
Born: 1894
Born: May 31
Died: 1956
Died: March 17
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Cambridge
Massachusetts
John Florence Sullivan
Taken
Humorous
Funny
Rage
Curmudgeon
Long
Likes
Annoy
Like
Anger
Strolling
People
Exercise
Sarcasm
Walking
Sarcastic
Especially
Annoying
Walks
Comedian

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Success is like dealing with your kid or teaching your wife to drive. Sooner or later you'll end up in the police station.
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During the Samuel Johnson days they had big men enjoying small talk today we have small men enjoying big talk.
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A molehill man is a pseudo-busy executive who comes to work at 9 AM and finds a molehill on his desk. He has until 5 PM to make this molehill into a mountain. An accomplished molehill man will often have his mountain finished before lunch.
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It is bad to suppress laughter. It goes back down and spreads to your hips.
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Life, in my estimation, is a biological misadventure that we terminate on the shoulders of six strange men whose only objective is to make a hole in one with you.
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What's on your mind, if you will allow the overstatement.
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A human being is nothing but a story with skin around it.
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A committee is a group of the unprepared, appointed by the unwilling to do the unnecessary.
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A celebrity is a person who works hard all of their life to become well known, and then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.
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Hush, little bright line, don’t you cry You’ll be a cliché by and by.
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