Quote

I would have loved to have had a gay dad. At school, there were always kids saying 'my dad is bigger than your dad, my dad will batter your dad!' So what? My dad will shag your dad..and your dad will enjoy it.

Frankie Boyle

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Frankie Boyle
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: August 16
Autobiographer
Comedian
Journalist
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Presenter
Writer
Francis Martin Patrick Boyle
Kids
Shag
School
Batter
Always
Gay
Would
Dad
Bigger
Loved
Saying
Enjoy

More quotes by Frankie Boyle

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My dad is one of the funniest people I know. He's the sort of man who can make you laugh just by reading out of a telephone directory... He's a spastic.
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It's good they're holding the Olympics in the East End of London. Means the athletes will have to use extra skill to work out which gunshot is the starting pistol.
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Jordan ran the London marathon to help raise money for the blind. After jogging that far with her body, I'm surprised she hasn't joined them!
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Do you think George Bush actually knows who Gordon Brown is? He probably just thinks Tony Blair's put on weight and had a mild stroke.
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Does anyone find it ironic how a program aimed at old people is called 'Countdown'?
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Why is it that it's okay to call a white person mate yet it's not okay to call a black guy primate?
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When I heard Cristiano Ronaldo was pictured holding a manbag, I was surprised it was a gucci bag and not another guy's sack.
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Political correctness has changed everything. People forget that political correctness used to be called spastic gay talk.
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RyanAir have been getting a hard time because they've launched a £7 flight to New York. Although as always with RyanAir it does land slightly outside of New York. In Dublin.
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Barack Obama will appeal to both black and white voters in America. White voters who'll think he's Tiger Woods.
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The average life expectancy rate in some parts of Glasgow is 54. If you've ever been there, you'll realize that that's maybe a bit long.
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Scientists have just built the world's biggest supercollider, and they're doing experiments to see what makes up protons. I hope that if the experiment's successful, the whole of our reality will dissolve, and a big sign will up come that says: Level Two.
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In the event of a cabin failure, oxygen masks will drop from the ceiling, and untangling them will annoy you before you die.
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I did Scottish footballer of the year this year, attempted to do some comedy at that. Not the brightest people in the world. There were seven O-Levels in that room, and they were all mine.
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A 66-YEAR-OLD woman has become the oldest new mum in Britain after giving birth to a baby boy. I'm amazed she needed to have a caesarean section though, you'd think at 66 she would have needed some masking tape down there just to stop it falling out.
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Welcome to Glasgow - the city where we punch people who are on fire.
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It seems amazing that the Navy SEALs managed to get inside the compound and shoot Osama so efficiently. I can only imagine they were told that the mission was to rescue a bearded British hostage and he must be brought out alive.
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I watched the footage of Saddam being executed, and it really made me think...is there nothing on the internet that I won't masturbate to?
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Bisexuals are really attracted to senior Lib Dems - as they are both a man and a great big pussy.
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Congratulations on passing your test! Your HIV positive.
Frankie Boyle