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I think that if a person doesn't feel cynical then they're out of phase with the 20th century. Being cynical is the only way to deal with modern civilization - you can't just swallow it whole.

Frank Zappa

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Frank Zappa
Age: 52 †
Born: 1940
Born: December 21
Died: 1993
Died: December 4
Actor
Composer
Film Director
Film Producer
Guitarist
Journalist
Musician
Record Producer
Rock Guitarist
Rock Musician
Screenwriter
Singer
Baltimore
Maryland
Frank Vincent Zappa
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Think
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Swallow
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Doesn
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More quotes by Frank Zappa

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What something is depends more on when it is than anything else.
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The crux of the biscuit is: If it entertains you, fine. Enjoy it. If it doesn't, then blow it out your ass. I do it to amuse myself. If I like it, I release it. If somebody else likes it, that's a bonus.
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The bassoon is one of my favorite instruments. It has a medieval aroma, like the days when everything used to sound like that. Some people crave baseball...I find this unfathomable, but I can easily understand why a person could get excited about playing the bassoon.
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She lives in Mojave in a Winnebago. His name is Bobby, he looks like a potato.
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I'm probably more famous for sitting on the toilet than for anything else that I do.
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So much gets lost in the translation. Even if you sat there listening to it with a microscope, there's no way you're gonna find out what it means.
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A drug is neither moral nor immoral - it's a chemical compound. The compound itself is not a menace to society until a human being treats it as if consumption bestowed a temporary license to act like an asshole.
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Modern Americans behave as if intelligence were some sort of hideous deformity.
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If you want to get together in any exclusive situation and have people love you, fine - but to hang all this desperate sociology on the idea of The Cloud-Guy who has The Big Book, who knows if you've been bad or good - and CARES about any of it - to hang it all on that, folks, is the chimpanzee part of the brain working.
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Find her, blind her, see who designed her. Act like a dummy until you grind her.
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Drugs will turn you into your parents.
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Nobody looks good bent over. Especially to pick up a check.
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The whole foundation of Christianity is based on the idea that intellectualism is the work of the Devil. Remember the apple on the tree? Okay, it was the Tree of Knowledge. You eat this apple, you're going to be as smart as God. We can't have that.
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What kind of man can name a child Moon Unit?
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Elvis has left the building to climb up that heavenly stair. So what if he looks like a wart-hog in heat?
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Whatever you have to do to have a good time, let's get on with it, so long as it doesn't cause a murder.
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You're baloney without the mayo.
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The last election just laid the foundation of the next 500 years of Dark Ages.
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Mr. Gorbachev has apparently stumbled onto one of the best-kept secrets in recent Soviet history: Communism doesn't work.
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