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Our big prize tonight is fifty American dollars to the girl with the most exciting mammalian protuberances.

Frank Zappa

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Frank Zappa
Age: 52 †
Born: 1940
Born: December 21
Died: 1993
Died: December 4
Actor
Composer
Film Director
Film Producer
Guitarist
Journalist
Musician
Record Producer
Rock Guitarist
Rock Musician
Screenwriter
Singer
Baltimore
Maryland
Frank Vincent Zappa
Fifty
Dollars
Exciting
American
Bigs
Girl
Mammalian
Prize
Tonight

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I wrote a song about dental floss but did anyone's teeth get cleaner?
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Whatever you have to do to have a good time, let's get on with it, so long as it doesn't cause a murder.
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I never set out to be weird. It was always other people who called me weird.
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Without music to decorate it, time is just a bunch of boring production deadlines or dates by which bills must be paid.
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I have an important message to deliver to all the cute people all over the world. If you're out there and you're cute, maybe you're beautiful. I just want to tell you somethin' — there's more of us UGLY MOTHERFUCKERS than you are, hey-y, so watch out.
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My guitar wants to kill your mama.
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Brown shoes don't make it.
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He wants to do you in cause the color of your skin.
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You don't think I work 14 hours a day right now?! I mean, I still put in the hours, I still do the work.
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Elvis has left the building to climb up that heavenly stair. So what if he looks like a wart-hog in heat?
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Tighten my headband for an extra rush.
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The bassoon is one of my favorite instruments. It has a medieval aroma, like the days when everything used to sound like that. Some people crave baseball...I find this unfathomable, but I can easily understand why a person could get excited about playing the bassoon.
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Our criminal institutions are full of creeps like you who do wrong things, and many of them were driven to these crimes by the horrible force called music.
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So many books, so little time.
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Do your job and do it right, life's a ball, TV tonight.
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The devil, he's about this big. He had a red suit on and a widow's peak, and then a pointed tail, and like a sulfur reek. Yes, it was him alright, I swear.
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Elmer has the mentality of approximately one peanut.
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Music is the most physically inspiring of all the arts.
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The crux of the biscuit is: If it entertains you, fine. Enjoy it. If it doesn't, then blow it out your ass. I do it to amuse myself. If I like it, I release it. If somebody else likes it, that's a bonus.
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Cocaine decisions that you make today, will mean nothing later on when you get nose decay.
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