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Our father has an even more important function than modeling manhood for us. He is also the authority to let us relax the requirements of the masculine model: if our father accepts us, then that declares us masculine enough to join the company of men. We, in effect, have our diploma in masculinity and can go on to develop other skills.

Frank Pittman

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Frank Pittman
Age: 77 †
Born: 1935
Born: January 1
Died: 2012
Died: November 24
Psychiatrist
Psychotherapist
the United States of America
Even
Authority
Join
Declares
Men
Effects
Relax
Diploma
Accepting
Model
Masculinity
Company
Develop
Accepts
Father
Effect
Modeling
Also
Models
Manhood
Enough
Function
Masculine
Important
Skills
Requirements

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To insult a friend implies that you respect his masculinity enough to know he can take it without acting like a crybaby. The swapping of insults, like the fighting between brothers, becomes the seal of the male bonding.
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Fidelity is the single most important element in solidly enduring marriages.
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A boy is not free to find a partner of his own as long as he must be the partner to his mother.
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If fathers who fear fathering and run away from it could only see how little fathering is enough. Mostly, the father just needs to be there.
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Men who have been raised violently have every reason to believe it is appropriate for them to control others through violence they feel no compunction over being violent to women, children, and one another.
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A man doesn't have to have all the answers children will teach him how to parent them, and in the process will teach him everything he needs to know about life.
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Parents can make us distrust ourselves. To them, we seem always to be works-in-progress.
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Parents have subtle ways of humbling you, of reminding you of your origins, perhaps by showing up at the moment of your greatest glory and reminding you where you came from and demonstrating that you still have some of it between your toes.
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No one, however powerful and successful, can function as an adult if his parents are not satisfied with him.
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In considering the ledger equal, understand the greatest gift you have given your parents is the opportunity to raise you. The things a child gets from parents can't compare to the things a parent gets from raising a child. Only by experiencing this can you understand the degree to which children give meaning to parents' lives.
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Happy people learn that happiness, like sweat, is a by-product of activity.
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Fathering is the most masculine thing a man can do.
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The secret to having a good marriage is to understand that marriage must be total, it must be permanent, and it must be equal.
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