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Two Irishmen were passing a pub - well, it could happen.
Frank Carson
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Frank Carson
Age: 85 †
Born: 1926
Born: June 11
Died: 2012
Died: February 22
Comedian
Stand-Up Comedian
Belfast
Ireland
Hugh Francis Carson
Passings
Passing
Happen
Happens
Two
Wells
Well
Irishmen
Pubs
More quotes by Frank Carson
I am accusing him of stealing my best material, he was a very funny man.
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Doctor told me I've got two weeks to live. I said: Can I have the last week in July and the 1st week in August?
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Did you know you can have an Irish abortion, but there is a 12 month waiting list?
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A man was found dead covered in sprinkles, strawberry sauce and a flake. Reports said he may have topped himself.
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I bought these shoes in Taiwan, and they said in the inside made around the corner.
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My wife went into the butchers and said: You've a sheep's head in your window. The butcher said: That's a mirror.
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A man walks into a pet shop and says: Give me a wasp. The shopkeeper replies: We don't sell wasps. He says: There's one in the window.
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Men only go for skinny women because they're too weak to argue - and salads are cheap.
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Have you heard about the Irishman who reversed into a car boot sale and sold the engine?
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A man says to his mate: My wife is a twin. His mate says, How do you tell them apart? The man says: Her brother has a beard.
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There was an Irish space program to go to the sun. They went at night so they didn't get burnt.
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Most of my jokes are racist - usually about the Irish.
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There were two Irishmen eating sandwiches in a pub and the landlord said: You can't eat your own food in here. So they swapped sandwiches.
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I was going up to the bathroom and a woman asked me: Have you a good memory for faces? I asked why and she said: Because there isn't a mirror up there.
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I said to the waitress, There's a fly swimming in my soup. She said: You've got too much soup - he should only be able to paddle.
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