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People in Northern Ireland vote for their church, they don't vote with their heads it is ridiculous.

Frank Carson

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Frank Carson
Age: 85 †
Born: 1926
Born: June 11
Died: 2012
Died: February 22
Comedian
Stand-Up Comedian
Belfast
Ireland
Hugh Francis Carson
Ridiculous
Vote
Church
People
Northern
Ireland
Heads

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Someone threw a petrol bomb at Alex Higgins once and he drank it!
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A man was found dead covered in sprinkles, strawberry sauce and a flake. Reports said he may have topped himself.
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My father fought in World War I and single-handedly destroyed the Germans' line of communication. He ate their pigeon.
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Doctor told me I've got two weeks to live. I said: Can I have the last week in July and the 1st week in August?
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I was going up to the bathroom and a woman asked me: Have you a good memory for faces? I asked why and she said: Because there isn't a mirror up there.
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A traffic policeman stops Sister Bridget for speeding. She pulls into the side of the road and winds down her window. The officer walks round and starts undoing his fly. Oh dear, she says, Not the breathalyser again.
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I just want to apologise for being late. I was flying back from Spain and the air hostess said: We are two hours late Mr Carson. When I asked why, she said: The pilot has heard a funny noise in the engine that he doesn't like, so we are waiting on another pilot who can't hear it.
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I am accusing him of stealing my best material, he was a very funny man.
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There was an Irish space program to go to the sun. They went at night so they didn't get burnt.
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This is Frank Carson, News at Ten, Sober.
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There were two Irishmen eating sandwiches in a pub and the landlord said: You can't eat your own food in here. So they swapped sandwiches.
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My idea for peace in the Middle East is to go back to the 1966 line, but to build even more houses for the Palestinians, who are a poor people.
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Men only go for skinny women because they're too weak to argue - and salads are cheap.
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I have a pacemaker in, but it doesn't work very well, because every time I fart the garage door opens.
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My wife went into the butchers and said: You've a sheep's head in your window. The butcher said: That's a mirror.
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America has only 100 Senators for 309 million people, but Stormont has 108 members for 1.7 million.
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Two Irishmen were passing a pub - well, it could happen.
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A man says to his mate: My wife is a twin. His mate says, How do you tell them apart? The man says: Her brother has a beard.
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