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I, unfortunately, take the subway a lot. It's not my preference, but it is my lot in life.

Fran Lebowitz

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Fran Lebowitz
Age: 74
Born: 1950
Born: October 27
Author
Humorist
Journalist
Orator
Writer
Morristown
NJ
Frances Ann Lebowitz
Robert Paine Cook
Subway
Preference
Unfortunately
Take
Life

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Spilling your guts is just exactly as charming as it sounds.
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A dog who thinks he is a man's best friend is a dog who obviously has never met a tax lawyer.
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Contrary to popular opinion, the hustle is not a new dance step - it is an old business procedure.
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I wish that real estate were cheaper and clothes were more expensive.
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Even when freshly washed and relieved of all obvious confections, children tend to be sticky.
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Notoriously insensitive to subtle shifts in mood, children will persist in discussing the color of a recently sighted cement-mixer long after one's own interest in the topic has waned.
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When Toni Morrison said 'write the book you want to read,' she didn't mean everybody.
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Children do not really need money. After all, they don't have to pay rent or send mailgrams.
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Luckily when you drive a cab there are two things: You don't have a boss in the cab with you, and you are not facing the people that you are making money from.
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I drank my lifetime supply of alcohol and I took my lifetime supply of drugs between the ages of 15 and 19.
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I walk a lot in New York, not for the exercise but to get from place to place, and because it's the way of having the least contact with human beings.
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Think before you speak. Read before you think.
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Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine.
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I am not... totally unreceptive to colour providing it makes its appearance quietly, deferentially, and without undue fanfare.
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Your responsibility as a parent is not as great as you might imagine. You need not supply the world with the next conqueror of disease or major motion picture star. If your child simply grows up to be someone who does not use the word collectible as a noun, you can consider yourself an unqualified success.
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London: A place you go to get bronchitis.
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Japanese food is very pretty and undoubtedly a suitable cuisine in Japan, which is largely populated by people of below average size. Hostesses hell-bent on serving such food to occidentals would be well advised to supplement it with something more substantial and to keep in mind that almost everybody likes french fries.
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Radio news is bearable. This is due to the fact that while the news is being broadcast, the disk jockey is not allowed to talk.
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Communism requires of its adherents that they arise early and participate in a strenuous round of calisthenics. To someone who wishes that cigarettes came already lit the thought of such exertion at an hour when decent people are just nodding off is thoroughly abhorrent.
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Not writing is probably the most exhausting profession I've ever encountered. It takes it out of you. It's very psychically wearing not to write - I mean if you're supposed to be writing.
Fran Lebowitz