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The great thing about New Jersey is that it's close to New York.
Fran Lebowitz
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Fran Lebowitz
Age: 74
Born: 1950
Born: October 27
Author
Humorist
Journalist
Orator
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Morristown
NJ
Frances Ann Lebowitz
Robert Paine Cook
Jersey
York
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Great
Thing
More quotes by Fran Lebowitz
Your life story would not make a good book. Don't even try.
Fran Lebowitz
Los Angeles is a large city-like area surrounding the Beverly Hills Hotel.
Fran Lebowitz
Writers have problems writing sex scenes, because writing one really well is pornography.
Fran Lebowitz
You can't go around hoping that most people have sterling moral characters. The most you can hope for is that people will pretend that they do.
Fran Lebowitz
Will power is not telling anybody you quit smoking.
Fran Lebowitz
I think one manifestation of integrity is holding a grudge. Saying no is a little different. Holding a grudge is the modern equivalent of having standards.
Fran Lebowitz
Sleep is death without the responsibility.
Fran Lebowitz
Romantic love is mental illness. But it's a pleasurable one. It's a drug. It distorts reality, and that's the point of it. It would be impossible to fall in love with someone that you really saw.
Fran Lebowitz
I had to go on TV with the president of the Catholic League, which is not an official organization at all, just a lot of Catholics, or maybe it's just this guy. He demanded to de-fund art completely and argued that taxpayers should not pay for it. I said people who represent the Catholic Church shouldn't talk about taxes.
Fran Lebowitz
Whenever someone accuses someone of being a racist - which is rare, you have to admit, considering how much racism there is - there is an incredible outrage. I realized that we live in an environment that it seems to be worse to call someone a racist than to be one.
Fran Lebowitz
If there were, say, only 10 percent of the hotels that exist now, there would be all these apartments for people who live in New York, as opposed to people visiting New York. And then all this junk in the theater, we would no longer need the kind of stuff that tourists like.
Fran Lebowitz
A woman's quest in life should be to find the perfect apartment. And I have found the perfect apartment. The perfect apartment is the first floor of the Metropolitan Museum. With a sofa.
Fran Lebowitz
I woke up at five o'clock in the morning with the whole first paragraph in my head. Now, this just shows what a slothful person I am: I tried to go back to sleep.
Fran Lebowitz
Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine.
Fran Lebowitz
I always liked people who are older. Of course, every year it gets harder to find them.
Fran Lebowitz
Money...buys privacy, silence. The less money you have, the noisier it is the thinner your walls, the closer your neighbors.... The first thing you notice when you step into the house or apartment of a rich person is how quiet it is.
Fran Lebowitz
Japanese food is very pretty and undoubtedly a suitable cuisine in Japan, which is largely populated by people of below average size. Hostesses hell-bent on serving such food to occidentals would be well advised to supplement it with something more substantial and to keep in mind that almost everybody likes french fries.
Fran Lebowitz
Breakfast cereals that come in the same colors as polyester leisure suits make oversleeping a virtue.
Fran Lebowitz
If you are of the opinion that the contemplation of suicide is sufficient evidence of a poetic nature, do not forget that actions speak louder than words.
Fran Lebowitz
New York was always more expensive than any other place in the United States, but you could live in New York - and by New York, I mean Manhattan. Brooklyn was the borough of grandparents. We didn't live well. We lived in these horrible places. But you could live in New York. And you didn't have to think about money every second.
Fran Lebowitz