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I never would start writing before midnight and I would finish at, like, seven in the morning.

Fran Lebowitz

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Fran Lebowitz
Age: 73
Born: 1950
Born: October 27
Author
Humorist
Journalist
Orator
Writer
Morristown
NJ
Frances Ann Lebowitz
Robert Paine Cook
Seven
Morning
Start
Writing
Never
Would
Like
Midnight
Finish

More quotes by Fran Lebowitz

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There are certain relationships I think I'm great at: I'm the world's greatest daughter. I'm a great relative. I believe I'm a great friend.
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To put it rather bluntly, I am not the type who wants to go back to the land I am the type who wants to go back to the hotel.
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While clothes with pictures and/or writing on them are not entirely an invention of the modern age, they are an unpleasant indication of the general state of things. ... I mean, be realistic. If people don't want to listen to you, what makes you think they want to hear from your sweater?
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Cheese that is required by law to append the word food to its title does not go well with red wine or fruit.
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Telling someone he looks healthy isn't a compliment -- it's a second opinion.
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Notoriously insensitive to subtle shifts in mood, children will persist in discussing the color of a recently sighted cement-mixer long after one's own interest in the topic has waned.
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...I believed passionately that Communists were a race of horned men who divided their time equally between the burning of Nancy Drew books and the devising of a plan of nuclear attack that would land the largest and most lethal bomb squarely upon the third-grade class of Thomas Jefferson School in Morristown, New Jersey.
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[On not reading newspapers:] If something important happens, your mother calls you.
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I walk a lot in New York, not for the exercise but to get from place to place, and because it's the way of having the least contact with human beings.
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I always liked people who are older. Of course, every year it gets harder to find them.
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What people don't know is: Clothes don't really fit you unless they're made for you. Especially when you wear men's clothes, like I do. American women think that clothes fit them if they can fit into them. But that's not at all what fit means.
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You can't go around hoping that most people have sterling moral characters. The most you can hope for is that people will pretend that they do.
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I wouldn't say that I dislike the young. I'm simply not a fan of naïveté.
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Scientists - the crowd that for dash and style make the general public look like the Bloomsbury set.
Fran Lebowitz
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I just write when fear overtakes me.
Fran Lebowitz
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Breakfast cereals that come in the same colors as polyester leisure suits make oversleeping a virtue.
Fran Lebowitz
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It is not true that there is dignity in all work. Some jobs are definitely better than others.
Fran Lebowitz
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Even when freshly washed and relieved of all obvious confections, children tend to be sticky.
Fran Lebowitz
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Marriage entitles women to the protection of a strong man who will steady the stepladder while they paint the kitchen ceiling.
Fran Lebowitz
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Perhaps the least cheering statement ever made on the subject of art is that life imitates it.
Fran Lebowitz