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You can be nasty when you are young, but you really have to be older to achieve bitterness.
Fran Lebowitz
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Fran Lebowitz
Age: 73
Born: 1950
Born: October 27
Author
Humorist
Journalist
Orator
Writer
Morristown
NJ
Frances Ann Lebowitz
Robert Paine Cook
Young
Really
Nasty
Bitterness
Older
Achieve
More quotes by Fran Lebowitz
To put it rather bluntly, I am not the type who wants to go back to the land I am the type who wants to go back to the hotel.
Fran Lebowitz
A salad is not a meal, it is a style.
Fran Lebowitz
I'm not a Communist. I'm an American. I'm a capitalist. I mean, I'm not a very good capitalist, myself. I'm not very good at it, but it's not that I'm not for capitalism. But people who believe in things like corporate citizenship, it's idiotic. I mean, it shows you're an idiot.
Fran Lebowitz
I'm such a slow writer I have no need for anything as fast as a word processor. I don't need anything so snappy. I write so slowly that I could write in my own blood without hurting myself.
Fran Lebowitz
No animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation.
Fran Lebowitz
I am not... totally unreceptive to colour providing it makes its appearance quietly, deferentially, and without undue fanfare.
Fran Lebowitz
All God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable.
Fran Lebowitz
Most writers write too much. I have the exact opposite problem. I feel I could write almost anything in a paragraph. I have a natural ability to condense, and so I often think, Are you kidding me? Five thousand words? How am I gonna make 5,000 words out of that?
Fran Lebowitz
The opposite of talking isn't listening. The opposite of talking is waiting.
Fran Lebowitz
The conversational overachiever is someone whose grasp exceeds his reach. This is possible but not attractive.
Fran Lebowitz
The second I learned to read in first grade, when I was 5, I preferred it to life. And I still do.
Fran Lebowitz
You can't go around hoping that most people have sterling moral characters. The most you can hope for is that people will pretend that they do.
Fran Lebowitz
[On the writers she admires:] I prefer dead writers, because I don't see them at parties.
Fran Lebowitz
Money...buys privacy, silence. The less money you have, the noisier it is the thinner your walls, the closer your neighbors.... The first thing you notice when you step into the house or apartment of a rich person is how quiet it is.
Fran Lebowitz
Never relinquish clothing to a hotel valet without first specifically telling him that you want it back.
Fran Lebowitz
The great thing about New Jersey is that it's close to New York.
Fran Lebowitz
There are certain relationships I think I'm great at: I'm the world's greatest daughter. I'm a great relative. I believe I'm a great friend.
Fran Lebowitz
Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine.
Fran Lebowitz
Will power is not telling anybody you quit smoking.
Fran Lebowitz
My desire to curtail undue freedom of speech extends only to such public areas as restaurants, airports, streets, hotel lobbies, parks, and department stores. Verbal exchanges between consenting adults in private are as of little interest to me as they probably are to them.
Fran Lebowitz