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I woke up at five o'clock in the morning with the whole first paragraph in my head. Now, this just shows what a slothful person I am: I tried to go back to sleep.

Fran Lebowitz

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Fran Lebowitz
Age: 73
Born: 1950
Born: October 27
Author
Humorist
Journalist
Orator
Writer
Morristown
NJ
Frances Ann Lebowitz
Robert Paine Cook
First
Sleep
Whole
Morning
Five
Slothful
Shows
Paragraph
Persons
Woke
Back
Clock
Person
Tried
Firsts
Head

More quotes by Fran Lebowitz

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To me the outdoors is what you must pass through in order to get from your apartment into a taxicab.
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I doubt there's ever been a true thing said on Fox. Maybe the weather report, maybe not.
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Writers have problems writing sex scenes, because writing one really well is pornography.
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I'm a horrible girlfriend. I always was. I'm great at the beginning, because I can be very romantic.
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It would also have been helpful to have gone to a Catholic grammar school. The only people who know grammar are those people who went to Catholic grammar school. Those nuns beat it into them.
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Radio news is bearable. This is due to the fact that while the news is being broadcast, the disk jockey is not allowed to talk.
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Romantic love is mental illness. But it's a pleasurable one. It's a drug. It distorts reality, and that's the point of it. It would be impossible to fall in love with someone that you really saw.
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Cheese that is required by law to append the word food to its title does not go well with red wine or fruit.
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Frenchman: Germans with good food.
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I'm like the laziest person who ever lived. It's amazing to me I even sit up.
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The second I learned to read in first grade, when I was 5, I preferred it to life. And I still do.
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The opposite of talking isn't listening. The opposite of talking is waiting.
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It is, in fact, safe to assume that, more often than not, life imitates craft, for who among us can say that our experience does not more closely resemble a macramé plant holder than it does a painting by Seurat. When it comes to art, life is the biggest copycat in the matter of the frame.
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I drank my lifetime supply of alcohol and I took my lifetime supply of drugs between the ages of 15 and 19.
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I always liked people who are older. Of course, every year it gets harder to find them.
Fran Lebowitz
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I have a hard time writing. Most writers have a hard time writing. I have a harder time than most because I'm lazier than most. I don't want to brag, but I'm the laziest person I have ever known.
Fran Lebowitz
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While clothes with pictures and/or writing on them are not entirely an invention of the modern age, they are an unpleasant indication of the general state of things. ... I mean, be realistic. If people don't want to listen to you, what makes you think they want to hear from your sweater?
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The telephone is a good way to talk to people without having to offer them a drink.
Fran Lebowitz
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I think writing for me has always been a matter of fear. Writing is fear and not writing is fear. I am afraid of writing and then I'm afraid of not writing.
Fran Lebowitz
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Abandon the search for Truth settle for a good fantasy
Fran Lebowitz