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Now people need special costumes to ride bicycles. I mean, a helmet, what, are you an astronaut??
Fran Lebowitz
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Fran Lebowitz
Age: 73
Born: 1950
Born: October 27
Author
Humorist
Journalist
Orator
Writer
Morristown
NJ
Frances Ann Lebowitz
Robert Paine Cook
Need
Mean
Bicycles
Needs
Helmet
People
Astronaut
Bicycle
Costumes
Ride
Special
More quotes by Fran Lebowitz
Food is an important part of a balanced diet.
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Sleep is death without the responsibility.
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Even when freshly washed and relieved of all obvious confections, children tend to be sticky.
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Your life story would not make a good book. Don't even try.
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What I can't be is monogamous. That tends to upset people. I just don't like domestic life.
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The opposite of talking isn't listening. The opposite of talking is waiting.
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Think before you speak. Read before you think. This will give you something to think about that you didn't make up yourself - a wise move at any age, but most especially at seventeen, when you are in the greatest danger of coming to annoying conclusions.
Fran Lebowitz
[On the writers she admires:] I prefer dead writers, because I don't see them at parties.
Fran Lebowitz
I have a hard time writing. Most writers have a hard time writing. I have a harder time than most because I'm lazier than most. I don't want to brag, but I'm the laziest person I have ever known.
Fran Lebowitz
I drank my lifetime supply of alcohol and I took my lifetime supply of drugs between the ages of 15 and 19.
Fran Lebowitz
Spilling your guts is just exactly as charming as it sounds.
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I hate, simply, to work. I just hate to work, period. I am profoundly slothful. Practically inert.
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When Toni Morrison said 'write the book you want to read,' she didn't mean everybody.
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I have the exact opposite problem of every writer I've ever met: Every writer I've ever met writes things that are too long, and they have to edit them down.
Fran Lebowitz
Luckily when you drive a cab there are two things: You don't have a boss in the cab with you, and you are not facing the people that you are making money from.
Fran Lebowitz
There is nothing more mine than my writing, nothing I'm more proprietary about.
Fran Lebowitz
Nothing lasts. So it's my belief, yes, I know a lot of the things that we liked didn't last, but maybe things we don't like, they're also not going to last. There has been progress in my lifetime. There are certainly things that are better than when I was young, and there are things that are worse. New York City, it's worse. There's no question.
Fran Lebowitz
I drove a cab. But all the girls I knew when I was young who had to work - there were rich girls - but the ones who had to work were waitresses. Because you could always get shifts in a restaurant.
Fran Lebowitz
When I fly, I'm never afraid the plane is going to crash. But there have often been times when I was afraid it wouldn't crash. I was just afraid it was going to circle O'Hare for the rest of my life.
Fran Lebowitz
I'm very lazy, I hate to work.
Fran Lebowitz