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Life was certainly more entertaining when people were indulging their vices as opposed to going to meetings to indulge in a new vice: discussing their innermost thoughts in public.

Fran Lebowitz

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Fran Lebowitz
Age: 73
Born: 1950
Born: October 27
Author
Humorist
Journalist
Orator
Writer
Morristown
NJ
Frances Ann Lebowitz
Robert Paine Cook
Public
Indulge
Going
Entertaining
Life
Vice
People
Opposed
Vices
Meetings
Indulging
Certainly
Innermost
Thoughts
Discussing

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Anti-smoking sentiment has replaced middle-class morality entirely. The smoker has taken the place of the homosexual. Today you hear people say things about smokers that used to be said about homosexuals - they pollute the environment you don't want them around your children.
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Calling a taxi in Texas is like calling a rabbi in Iraq.
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There's nothing like being old to be sure of everything.
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I've never seen the Kardashians I'm not sure who they are. But I know a lot about them because it's impossible not to.
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When I was very little, say five or six, I became aware of the fact that people wrote books. Before that, I thought that God wrote books. I thought a book was a manifestation of nature, like a tree.
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I hate academic mysteries. As soon as I come across the word 'don' and it's not someone's first name, I close the book.
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Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying.
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Perhaps one of the more noteworthy trends of our time is the occupation of buildings accompanied by the taking of hostages. The perpetrators of these deeds are generally motivated by political grievance, social injustice, and the deeply felt desire to see how they look on TV.
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No one I knew talked about money. It's not an area of interest.
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I have friends, some of whom are spectacularly good writers, who really want someone to edit them. I don't register that impulse. It's like the impulse for wanting a dog.
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I'm such a slow writer I have no need for anything as fast as a word processor. I don't need anything so snappy. I write so slowly that I could write in my own blood without hurting myself.
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This idea that people have to love and understand each other is absurd. It's not human nature.
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[On the writers she admires:] I prefer dead writers, because I don't see them at parties.
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I prefer dead writers because you don't run into them at parties.
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I hate writing. I will do anything to avoid it. The only way I could write less was if I was dead.
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Even when America is not working that well, it still works better than other places.
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Your life story would not make a good book. Don't even try.
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I woke up at five o'clock in the morning with the whole first paragraph in my head. Now, this just shows what a slothful person I am: I tried to go back to sleep.
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Scientists - the crowd that for dash and style make the general public look like the Bloomsbury set.
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