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Marriage entitles women to the protection of a strong man who will steady the stepladder while they paint the kitchen ceiling.
Fran Lebowitz
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Fran Lebowitz
Age: 74
Born: 1950
Born: October 27
Author
Humorist
Journalist
Orator
Writer
Morristown
NJ
Frances Ann Lebowitz
Robert Paine Cook
Strong
Entitles
Women
Ceiling
Men
Ceilings
Steady
Kitchen
Protection
Paint
Marriage
More quotes by Fran Lebowitz
To me the outdoors is what you must pass through in order to get from your apartment into a taxicab.
Fran Lebowitz
If there had been a job of being a reader, I would have taken that, because I love to read and I don't love to write. That would be blissful.
Fran Lebowitz
Anti-smoking sentiment has replaced middle-class morality entirely. The smoker has taken the place of the homosexual. Today you hear people say things about smokers that used to be said about homosexuals - they pollute the environment you don't want them around your children.
Fran Lebowitz
I doubt there's ever been a true thing said on Fox. Maybe the weather report, maybe not.
Fran Lebowitz
I never wanted to have any extra money, if it meant having to have any extra work.
Fran Lebowitz
Abandon the search for Truth settle for a good fantasy
Fran Lebowitz
I always liked people who are older. Of course, every year it gets harder to find them.
Fran Lebowitz
Most writers write too much. I have the exact opposite problem. I feel I could write almost anything in a paragraph. I have a natural ability to condense, and so I often think, Are you kidding me? Five thousand words? How am I gonna make 5,000 words out of that?
Fran Lebowitz
Contrary to popular opinion, the hustle is not a new dance step - it is an old business procedure.
Fran Lebowitz
Tourism as a number-one industry is a terrible, terrible idea for any city, especially New York. If you were going to turn a city, which is a place where people live, into a tourist attraction, you're going to have to make it a place that people who don't live here, like. So I object to living in a place for people who don't live here.
Fran Lebowitz
Children do not really need money. After all, they don't have to pay rent or send mailgrams.
Fran Lebowitz
I never would start writing before midnight and I would finish at, like, seven in the morning.
Fran Lebowitz
if you live in New York and you have a guest room, you have guests. So I think it's best not to have a guest room.
Fran Lebowitz
Money...buys privacy, silence. The less money you have, the noisier it is the thinner your walls, the closer your neighbors.... The first thing you notice when you step into the house or apartment of a rich person is how quiet it is.
Fran Lebowitz
I think writing for me has always been a matter of fear. Writing is fear and not writing is fear. I am afraid of writing and then I'm afraid of not writing.
Fran Lebowitz
If you removed all of the homosexuals and homosexual influence from what is generally regarded as American culture, you would pretty much be left with Let's Make a Deal.
Fran Lebowitz
The thing you love right away, don't do it, because that's the very thing that's going to be your addiction for the rest of your life.
Fran Lebowitz
There are too many books. The books are terrible. And this is because you have been taught to have self-esteem.
Fran Lebowitz
Until I was about 7, I thought books were just there, like trees. When I learned that people actually wrote them, I wanted to, too, because all children aspire to inhuman feats like flying. Most people grow up to realize they can't fly. Writers are people who don't grow up to realize they can't be God.
Fran Lebowitz
People who get married because they're in love make a ridiculous mistake. It makes much more sense to marry your best friend. You like your best friend more than anyone you're ever going to be in love with. You dont choose your best friend because they have a cute nose.
Fran Lebowitz