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I hate academic mysteries. As soon as I come across the word 'don' and it's not someone's first name, I close the book.
Fran Lebowitz
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Fran Lebowitz
Age: 74
Born: 1950
Born: October 27
Author
Humorist
Journalist
Orator
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Morristown
NJ
Frances Ann Lebowitz
Robert Paine Cook
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Soon
Book
Mystery
Come
Close
First
Name
Names
Word
Mysteries
Hate
Academic
Someone
Across
More quotes by Fran Lebowitz
Your responsibility as a parent is not as great as you might imagine. You need not supply the world with the next conqueror of disease or major motion picture star. If your child simply grows up to be someone who does not use the word collectible as a noun, you can consider yourself an unqualified success.
Fran Lebowitz
In New York we have zillions of different kinds of people, many of them hate each other, but violence based on that hatred is really uncommon here.
Fran Lebowitz
Life was certainly more entertaining when people were indulging their vices as opposed to going to meetings to indulge in a new vice: discussing their innermost thoughts in public.
Fran Lebowitz
What people don't know is: Clothes don't really fit you unless they're made for you. Especially when you wear men's clothes, like I do. American women think that clothes fit them if they can fit into them. But that's not at all what fit means.
Fran Lebowitz
Will power is not telling anybody you quit smoking.
Fran Lebowitz
I do not think everyone is created equal. In fact, I know they're not. [The Constitution] means that everyone should have the same laws as everyone else. It doesn't mean that everyone's as smart or as cute or as lucky as everyone else.
Fran Lebowitz
I'm not a Communist. I'm an American. I'm a capitalist. I mean, I'm not a very good capitalist, myself. I'm not very good at it, but it's not that I'm not for capitalism. But people who believe in things like corporate citizenship, it's idiotic. I mean, it shows you're an idiot.
Fran Lebowitz
I never had a typewriter. I never had any machines.
Fran Lebowitz
Nothing lasts. So it's my belief, yes, I know a lot of the things that we liked didn't last, but maybe things we don't like, they're also not going to last. There has been progress in my lifetime. There are certainly things that are better than when I was young, and there are things that are worse. New York City, it's worse. There's no question.
Fran Lebowitz
While clothes with pictures and/or writing on them are not entirely an invention of the modern age, they are an unpleasant indication of the general state of things. ... I mean, be realistic. If people don't want to listen to you, what makes you think they want to hear from your sweater?
Fran Lebowitz
I, unfortunately, take the subway a lot. It's not my preference, but it is my lot in life.
Fran Lebowitz
The great thing about New Jersey is that it's close to New York.
Fran Lebowitz
The Italians are the most civilized people. And they're very warm. Basically, they're Jews with great architecture.
Fran Lebowitz
I'd like to decide who comes here. I'd like to be the admissions director of New York.
Fran Lebowitz
If your sexual fantasies were truly of interest to others, they would no longer be fantasies.
Fran Lebowitz
It's very important when making a friend to check and see if they have a private plane. People think a good personality trait in a friend is kindness or a sense of humor. No, in a friend a good personality trait is a Gulfstream.
Fran Lebowitz
I always liked people who are older. Of course, every year it gets harder to find them.
Fran Lebowitz
Any artist who has that quality of timelessness has that quality because they tell the truth.
Fran Lebowitz
The main symptom of falling in love is that you lose your intellectual prowess.
Fran Lebowitz
People always say pop culture. As if we have some high culture to distinguish it from.
Fran Lebowitz
