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Telling someone he looks healthy isn't a compliment -- it's a second opinion.

Fran Lebowitz

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Fran Lebowitz
Age: 74
Born: 1950
Born: October 27
Author
Humorist
Journalist
Orator
Writer
Morristown
NJ
Frances Ann Lebowitz
Robert Paine Cook
Second
Opinion
Someone
Looks
Compliment
Telling
Healthy

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In the Soviet Union, capitalism triumphed over communism. In this country, capitalism triumphed over democracy.
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I always liked people who are older. Of course, every year it gets harder to find them.
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Forcing people into a situation where they're supposed to adore each other is probably bad. But letting people get on and off the 6 train without stabbing each other, that's good.
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I stopped taking drugs when I was 19, and who wants to drive a cab around New York with drugs in their car?
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Do not have your child's hair cut by a real hairdresser in a real hairdressing salon. He is, at this point, far too short to be exposed to contempt.
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If your sexual fantasies were truly of interest to others, they would no longer be fantasies.
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I never met anyone who didn't have a very smart child. What happens to these children, you wonder, when they reach adulthood?
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It is not true that there is dignity in all work. Some jobs are definitely better than others.
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Marriage entitles women to the protection of a strong man who will steady the stepladder while they paint the kitchen ceiling.
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To me the outdoors is what you must pass through in order to get from your apartment into a taxicab.
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If you want to get ahead in this world get a lawyer -- not a book.
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There's too much democracy in the culture, not enough in the society.
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Frenchman: Germans with good food.
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I drank my lifetime supply of alcohol and I took my lifetime supply of drugs between the ages of 15 and 19.
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I do not believe in God. I believe in cashmere.
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It is, in fact, safe to assume that, more often than not, life imitates craft, for who among us can say that our experience does not more closely resemble a macramé plant holder than it does a painting by Seurat. When it comes to art, life is the biggest copycat in the matter of the frame.
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The main symptom of falling in love is that you lose your intellectual prowess.
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A woman's quest in life should be to find the perfect apartment. And I have found the perfect apartment. The perfect apartment is the first floor of the Metropolitan Museum. With a sofa.
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I have a hard time writing. Most writers have a hard time writing. I have a harder time than most because I'm lazier than most. I don't want to brag, but I'm the laziest person I have ever known.
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Once you go outside your natural audience, there are tons of people that don't like you.
Fran Lebowitz