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Generally speaking, the poorer person summers where he winters.

Fran Lebowitz

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Fran Lebowitz
Age: 74
Born: 1950
Born: October 27
Author
Humorist
Journalist
Orator
Writer
Morristown
NJ
Frances Ann Lebowitz
Robert Paine Cook
Summers
Poorer
Speaking
Generally
Winter
Summer
Persons
Person
Winters

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Luckily when you drive a cab there are two things: You don't have a boss in the cab with you, and you are not facing the people that you are making money from.
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If you're going to America, bring your own food.
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Think before you speak. Read before you think. This will give you something to think about that you didn't make up yourself - a wise move at any age, but most especially at seventeen, when you are in the greatest danger of coming to annoying conclusions.
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The Italians are the most civilized people. And they're very warm. Basically, they're Jews with great architecture.
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Tourism as a number-one industry is a terrible, terrible idea for any city, especially New York. If you were going to turn a city, which is a place where people live, into a tourist attraction, you're going to have to make it a place that people who don't live here, like. So I object to living in a place for people who don't live here.
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All God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable.
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Anti-smoking sentiment has replaced middle-class morality entirely. The smoker has taken the place of the homosexual. Today you hear people say things about smokers that used to be said about homosexuals - they pollute the environment you don't want them around your children.
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Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine.
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The second I learned to read in first grade, when I was 5, I preferred it to life. And I still do.
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If people don't hold grudges, it means they just don't care what people do.
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No animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation.
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What I can't be is monogamous. That tends to upset people. I just don't like domestic life.
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There are too many books. The books are terrible. And this is because you have been taught to have self-esteem.
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If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail.
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Cheese that is required by law to append the word food to its title does not go well with red wine or fruit.
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This idea that people have to love and understand each other is absurd. It's not human nature.
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My desire to curtail undue freedom of speech extends only to such public areas as restaurants, airports, streets, hotel lobbies, parks, and department stores. Verbal exchanges between consenting adults in private are as of little interest to me as they probably are to them.
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When someone asks, 'Why do you think he's not calling me?' there's always one answer - 'He's not interested.' There's not ever any other answer.
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Your responsibility as a parent is not as great as you might imagine. You need not supply the world with the next conqueror of disease or major motion picture star. If your child simply grows up to be someone who does not use the word collectible as a noun, you can consider yourself an unqualified success.
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Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying.
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