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Breakfast cereals that come in the same colors as polyester leisure suits make oversleeping a virtue.

Fran Lebowitz

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Fran Lebowitz
Age: 74
Born: 1950
Born: October 27
Author
Humorist
Journalist
Orator
Writer
Morristown
NJ
Frances Ann Lebowitz
Robert Paine Cook
Come
Colors
Make
Leisure
Breakfast
Suits
Cooking
Cereals
Color
Polyester
Food
Cereal
Virtue
Culinary

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I hate writing. I will do anything to avoid it. The only way I could write less was if I was dead.
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To put it rather bluntly, I am not the type who wants to go back to the land I am the type who wants to go back to the hotel.
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I don't like to read nonfiction. To me, fact is something I can look up.
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In Rome people spend most of their time having lunch. And they do it very well - Rome is unquestionably the lunch capital of the world.
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A community is a butcher and a doctor, a minister, a town troublemaker. A community is not a bunch of people united by some grievance. That's just self-righteousness - incredibly dangerous and antidemocratic.
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I'm not a nervous person. I'm not afraid to be on TV. I'm only afraid when I write. When I'm at my desk I feel like most people would feel if they went on TV.
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Even when freshly washed and relieved of all obvious confections, children tend to be sticky.
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In the Soviet Union, capitalism triumphed over communism. In this country, capitalism triumphed over democracy.
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I've never seen the Kardashians I'm not sure who they are. But I know a lot about them because it's impossible not to.
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Perhaps one of the more noteworthy trends of our time is the occupation of buildings accompanied by the taking of hostages. The perpetrators of these deeds are generally motivated by political grievance, social injustice, and the deeply felt desire to see how they look on TV.
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When I fly, I'm never afraid the plane is going to crash. But there have often been times when I was afraid it wouldn't crash. I was just afraid it was going to circle O'Hare for the rest of my life.
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The opposite of talking isn't listening. The opposite of talking is waiting.
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I'm like the laziest person who ever lived. It's amazing to me I even sit up.
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New York was always more expensive than any other place in the United States, but you could live in New York - and by New York, I mean Manhattan. Brooklyn was the borough of grandparents. We didn't live well. We lived in these horrible places. But you could live in New York. And you didn't have to think about money every second.
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When Toni Morrison said 'write the book you want to read,' she didn't mean everybody.
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Communism requires of its adherents that they arise early and participate in a strenuous round of calisthenics. To someone who wishes that cigarettes came already lit the thought of such exertion at an hour when decent people are just nodding off is thoroughly abhorrent.
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There is nothing more mine than my writing, nothing I'm more proprietary about.
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All style is personal - that's what distinguishes it from fashion.
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No animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation.
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Writing is so hard. Why would you be a writer if you weren't really good at it? If you could be anything else, why would you be a writer?
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