Quote

Being offended is a natural consequence of leaving the house.

Fran Lebowitz

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Fran Lebowitz
Age: 74
Born: 1950
Born: October 27
Author
Humorist
Journalist
Orator
Writer
Morristown
NJ
Frances Ann Lebowitz
Robert Paine Cook
House
Offended
Consequence
Leaving
Natural
History

More quotes by Fran Lebowitz

Image
When someone asks, 'Why do you think he's not calling me?' there's always one answer - 'He's not interested.' There's not ever any other answer.
Fran Lebowitz
Image
A woman's quest in life should be to find the perfect apartment. And I have found the perfect apartment. The perfect apartment is the first floor of the Metropolitan Museum. With a sofa.
Fran Lebowitz
Image
When I was very little, say five or six, I became aware of the fact that people wrote books. Before that, I thought that God wrote books. I thought a book was a manifestation of nature, like a tree.
Fran Lebowitz
Image
There are too many books. The books are terrible. And this is because you have been taught to have self-esteem.
Fran Lebowitz
Image
It's very important when making a friend to check and see if they have a private plane. People think a good personality trait in a friend is kindness or a sense of humor. No, in a friend a good personality trait is a Gulfstream.
Fran Lebowitz
Image
It is imperative when flying coach that you restrain any tendency toward the vividly imaginative. For although it may momentarily appear to be the case, it is not at all likely that the cabin is entirely inhabited by crying babies smoking inexpensive domestic cigars.
Fran Lebowitz
Image
Because I was young, I had this long hair, and people used to try to tip me with joints.
Fran Lebowitz
Image
Food is an important part of a balanced diet.
Fran Lebowitz
Image
Contrary to popular opinion, the hustle is not a new dance step - it is an old business procedure.
Fran Lebowitz
Image
Telling someone he looks healthy isn't a compliment -- it's a second opinion.
Fran Lebowitz
Image
Abandon the search for Truth settle for a good fantasy
Fran Lebowitz
Image
My desire to curtail undue freedom of speech extends only to such public areas as restaurants, airports, streets, hotel lobbies, parks, and department stores. Verbal exchanges between consenting adults in private are as of little interest to me as they probably are to them.
Fran Lebowitz
Image
A great many people in Los Angeles are on special diets that restrict their intake of synthetic foods. The reason for this appears to be a widely held belief that organically grown fruits and vegetables make the cocaine work faster.
Fran Lebowitz
Image
I write a sentence a thousand times, changing it all the time to look at it in different ways.
Fran Lebowitz
Image
Sleep is death without the responsibility.
Fran Lebowitz
Image
Television turned out to be exactly as bad as the most irritating and pedantic intellectuals of the '50s said it was going to be.
Fran Lebowitz
Image
Vegetables are interesting but lack a sense of purpose when unaccompanied by a good cut of meat.
Fran Lebowitz
Image
I hate academic mysteries. As soon as I come across the word 'don' and it's not someone's first name, I close the book.
Fran Lebowitz
Image
Did it ever occur to anyone that if you put nice libraries in public schools you wouldn't have to put them in prisons?
Fran Lebowitz
Image
New York was always more expensive than the other places, even when it was going bankrupt. In other words, in 1971, New York was expensive for someone with no money. For anyone.
Fran Lebowitz