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I prefer dead writers because you don't run into them at parties.
Fran Lebowitz
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Fran Lebowitz
Age: 73
Born: 1950
Born: October 27
Author
Humorist
Journalist
Orator
Writer
Morristown
NJ
Frances Ann Lebowitz
Robert Paine Cook
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Writers
Dead
Party
Running
More quotes by Fran Lebowitz
Abandon the search for Truth settle for a good fantasy
Fran Lebowitz
A woman's quest in life should be to find the perfect apartment. And I have found the perfect apartment. The perfect apartment is the first floor of the Metropolitan Museum. With a sofa.
Fran Lebowitz
Cheese that is required by law to append the word food to its title does not go well with red wine or fruit.
Fran Lebowitz
Romantic love is mental illness. But it's a pleasurable one. It's a drug. It distorts reality, and that's the point of it. It would be impossible to fall in love with someone that you really saw.
Fran Lebowitz
Radio news is bearable. This is due to the fact that while the news is being broadcast, the disk jockey is not allowed to talk.
Fran Lebowitz
I have friends, some of whom are spectacularly good writers, who really want someone to edit them. I don't register that impulse. It's like the impulse for wanting a dog.
Fran Lebowitz
The Italians are the most civilized people. And they're very warm. Basically, they're Jews with great architecture.
Fran Lebowitz
You can't go around hoping that most people have sterling moral characters. The most you can hope for is that people will pretend that they do.
Fran Lebowitz
My desire to curtail undue freedom of speech extends only to such public areas as restaurants, airports, streets, hotel lobbies, parks, and department stores. Verbal exchanges between consenting adults in private are as of little interest to me as they probably are to them.
Fran Lebowitz
If your sexual fantasies were truly of interest to others, they would no longer be fantasies.
Fran Lebowitz
It is, in fact, safe to assume that, more often than not, life imitates craft, for who among us can say that our experience does not more closely resemble a macramé plant holder than it does a painting by Seurat. When it comes to art, life is the biggest copycat in the matter of the frame.
Fran Lebowitz
In New York we have zillions of different kinds of people, many of them hate each other, but violence based on that hatred is really uncommon here.
Fran Lebowitz
Even when America is not working that well, it still works better than other places.
Fran Lebowitz
When Toni Morrison said 'write the book you want to read,' she didn't mean everybody.
Fran Lebowitz
I had to go on TV with the president of the Catholic League, which is not an official organization at all, just a lot of Catholics, or maybe it's just this guy. He demanded to de-fund art completely and argued that taxpayers should not pay for it. I said people who represent the Catholic Church shouldn't talk about taxes.
Fran Lebowitz
There's no such thing as advice to the lovelorn. If they took advice, they wouldn't be lovelorn.
Fran Lebowitz
I'm very lazy, I hate to work.
Fran Lebowitz
I never would start writing before midnight and I would finish at, like, seven in the morning.
Fran Lebowitz
I hate writing. I will do anything to avoid it. The only way I could write less was if I was dead.
Fran Lebowitz
A great many people in Los Angeles are on special diets that restrict their intake of synthetic foods. The reason for this appears to be a widely held belief that organically grown fruits and vegetables make the cocaine work faster.
Fran Lebowitz