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I do not believe in God. I believe in cashmere.

Fran Lebowitz

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Fran Lebowitz
Age: 74
Born: 1950
Born: October 27
Author
Humorist
Journalist
Orator
Writer
Morristown
NJ
Frances Ann Lebowitz
Robert Paine Cook
Cashmere
Believe

More quotes by Fran Lebowitz

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Whenever I am doing anything else, which is most of the time, even if it is not something like robbing a bank, I feel felonious. Writing is what I'm supposed to be doing.
Fran Lebowitz
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If you want to get ahead in this world get a lawyer -- not a book.
Fran Lebowitz
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Now people need special costumes to ride bicycles. I mean, a helmet, what, are you an astronaut??
Fran Lebowitz
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I hate academic mysteries. As soon as I come across the word 'don' and it's not someone's first name, I close the book.
Fran Lebowitz
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I'd like to decide who comes here. I'd like to be the admissions director of New York.
Fran Lebowitz
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People always say pop culture. As if we have some high culture to distinguish it from.
Fran Lebowitz
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The French probably invented the very notion of discretion. It's not that they feel that what you don't know won't hurt you they feel that what you don't know won't hurt them. To the French lying is simply talking.
Fran Lebowitz
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You can be nasty when you are young, but you really have to be older to achieve bitterness.
Fran Lebowitz
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I stopped taking drugs when I was 19, and who wants to drive a cab around New York with drugs in their car?
Fran Lebowitz
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Money...buys privacy, silence. The less money you have, the noisier it is the thinner your walls, the closer your neighbors.... The first thing you notice when you step into the house or apartment of a rich person is how quiet it is.
Fran Lebowitz
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There's too much democracy in the culture, not enough in the society.
Fran Lebowitz
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I'm like the laziest person who ever lived. It's amazing to me I even sit up.
Fran Lebowitz
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I think writing for me has always been a matter of fear. Writing is fear and not writing is fear. I am afraid of writing and then I'm afraid of not writing.
Fran Lebowitz
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Life is something to do when you can't get to sleep.
Fran Lebowitz
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I have a hard time writing. Most writers have a hard time writing. I have a harder time than most because I'm lazier than most. I don't want to brag, but I'm the laziest person I have ever known.
Fran Lebowitz
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Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying.
Fran Lebowitz
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Contrary to popular opinion, the hustle is not a new dance step - it is an old business procedure.
Fran Lebowitz
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I never had a typewriter. I never had any machines.
Fran Lebowitz
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What I can't be is monogamous. That tends to upset people. I just don't like domestic life.
Fran Lebowitz
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Anti-smoking sentiment has replaced middle-class morality entirely. The smoker has taken the place of the homosexual. Today you hear people say things about smokers that used to be said about homosexuals - they pollute the environment you don't want them around your children.
Fran Lebowitz