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Radio news is bearable. This is due to the fact that while the news is being broadcast, the disk jockey is not allowed to talk.

Fran Lebowitz

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Fran Lebowitz
Age: 74
Born: 1950
Born: October 27
Author
Humorist
Journalist
Orator
Writer
Morristown
NJ
Frances Ann Lebowitz
Robert Paine Cook
Literature
Bearable
Talk
Sarcasm
Sarcastic
Fact
Dues
Jockey
Funny
Allowed
Jockeys
Facts
Radio
Disk
News
Broadcast
Humor
Broadcasting

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I have the exact opposite problem of every writer I've ever met: Every writer I've ever met writes things that are too long, and they have to edit them down.
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A community is a butcher and a doctor, a minister, a town troublemaker. A community is not a bunch of people united by some grievance. That's just self-righteousness - incredibly dangerous and antidemocratic.
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A dog who thinks he is a man's best friend is a dog who obviously has never met a tax lawyer.
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I always liked people who are older. Of course, every year it gets harder to find them.
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Food is definitely important part of your balanced diet.
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I never had a typewriter. I never had any machines.
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I have friends, some of whom are spectacularly good writers, who really want someone to edit them. I don't register that impulse. It's like the impulse for wanting a dog.
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No one I knew talked about money. It's not an area of interest.
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I never met anyone who didn't have a very smart child. What happens to these children, you wonder, when they reach adulthood?
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Democracy is an interesting, even laudable, notion and there is no question but that when compared to Communism, which is too dull, or Fascism, which is too exciting, it emerges as the most palatable form of government.
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Being offended is a natural consequence of leaving the house.
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Writing is so hard. Why would you be a writer if you weren't really good at it? If you could be anything else, why would you be a writer?
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A woman's quest in life should be to find the perfect apartment. And I have found the perfect apartment. The perfect apartment is the first floor of the Metropolitan Museum. With a sofa.
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Do not have your child's hair cut by a real hairdresser in a real hairdressing salon. He is, at this point, far too short to be exposed to contempt.
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The main symptom of falling in love is that you lose your intellectual prowess.
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Knowingness is sexy. The opposite of sexy is naivete.
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My dream writing room would be the Imperial Library in Vienna.
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There's too much democracy in the culture, not enough in the society.
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Cheese that is required by law to append the word food to its title does not go well with red wine or fruit.
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If you removed all of the homosexuals and homosexual influence from what is generally regarded as American culture, you would pretty much be left with Let's Make a Deal.
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