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Your life story would not make a good book. Don't even try.

Fran Lebowitz

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Fran Lebowitz
Age: 74
Born: 1950
Born: October 27
Author
Humorist
Journalist
Orator
Writer
Morristown
NJ
Frances Ann Lebowitz
Robert Paine Cook
Writing
Even
Trying
Make
Good
Would
Story
Life
Stories
Book

More quotes by Fran Lebowitz

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When someone asks, 'Why do you think he's not calling me?' there's always one answer - 'He's not interested.' There's not ever any other answer.
Fran Lebowitz
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A great many people in Los Angeles are on special diets that restrict their intake of synthetic foods. The reason for this appears to be a widely held belief that organically grown fruits and vegetables make the cocaine work faster.
Fran Lebowitz
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In Rome people spend most of their time having lunch. And they do it very well - Rome is unquestionably the lunch capital of the world.
Fran Lebowitz
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Writers get exactly the right amount of fame: just enough to get a good table in a restaurant but not enough so that people are constantly interrupting you while you're eating dinner.
Fran Lebowitz
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I never met anyone who didn't have a very smart child. What happens to these children, you wonder, when they reach adulthood?
Fran Lebowitz
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The second I learned to read in first grade, when I was 5, I preferred it to life. And I still do.
Fran Lebowitz
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New York was always more expensive than any other place in the United States, but you could live in New York - and by New York, I mean Manhattan. Brooklyn was the borough of grandparents. We didn't live well. We lived in these horrible places. But you could live in New York. And you didn't have to think about money every second.
Fran Lebowitz
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People who get married because they're in love make a ridiculous mistake. It makes much more sense to marry your best friend. You like your best friend more than anyone you're ever going to be in love with. You dont choose your best friend because they have a cute nose.
Fran Lebowitz
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People always say pop culture. As if we have some high culture to distinguish it from.
Fran Lebowitz
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Money...buys privacy, silence. The less money you have, the noisier it is the thinner your walls, the closer your neighbors.... The first thing you notice when you step into the house or apartment of a rich person is how quiet it is.
Fran Lebowitz
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It would also have been helpful to have gone to a Catholic grammar school. The only people who know grammar are those people who went to Catholic grammar school. Those nuns beat it into them.
Fran Lebowitz
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There is nothing more mine than my writing, nothing I'm more proprietary about.
Fran Lebowitz
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The telephone is a good way to talk to people without having to offer them a drink.
Fran Lebowitz
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There's no such thing as advice to the lovelorn. If they took advice, they wouldn't be lovelorn.
Fran Lebowitz
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Whenever someone accuses someone of being a racist - which is rare, you have to admit, considering how much racism there is - there is an incredible outrage. I realized that we live in an environment that it seems to be worse to call someone a racist than to be one.
Fran Lebowitz
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There's nothing like being old to be sure of everything.
Fran Lebowitz
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People care more about trends now than they do about style. They get so wrapped up in what's happening that they forget how to dress, and they never learn who they are because they never learn how to take care of anything.
Fran Lebowitz
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I do not believe in God. I believe in cashmere.
Fran Lebowitz
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Scientists - the crowd that for dash and style make the general public look like the Bloomsbury set.
Fran Lebowitz
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[On the writers she admires:] I prefer dead writers, because I don't see them at parties.
Fran Lebowitz