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Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying.
Fran Lebowitz
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Fran Lebowitz
Age: 73
Born: 1950
Born: October 27
Author
Humorist
Journalist
Orator
Writer
Morristown
NJ
Frances Ann Lebowitz
Robert Paine Cook
Humorous
Child
Cooking
Children
Dinner
Life
Eating
Wants
Parenting
Food
Culinary
Parent
Buying
Asks
More quotes by Fran Lebowitz
What I can't be is monogamous. That tends to upset people. I just don't like domestic life.
Fran Lebowitz
Because I was young, I had this long hair, and people used to try to tip me with joints.
Fran Lebowitz
I'm not a nervous person. I'm not afraid to be on TV. I'm only afraid when I write. When I'm at my desk I feel like most people would feel if they went on TV.
Fran Lebowitz
I never met anyone who didn't have a very smart child. What happens to these children, you wonder, when they reach adulthood?
Fran Lebowitz
Having been unpopular in high school is not just cause for book publications.
Fran Lebowitz
Forcing people into a situation where they're supposed to adore each other is probably bad. But letting people get on and off the 6 train without stabbing each other, that's good.
Fran Lebowitz
I write so slowly, I could write with my own blood and not hurt myself.
Fran Lebowitz
I never had a typewriter. I never had any machines.
Fran Lebowitz
If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail.
Fran Lebowitz
I'm not a Communist. I'm an American. I'm a capitalist. I mean, I'm not a very good capitalist, myself. I'm not very good at it, but it's not that I'm not for capitalism. But people who believe in things like corporate citizenship, it's idiotic. I mean, it shows you're an idiot.
Fran Lebowitz
There are too many books. The books are terrible. And this is because you have been taught to have self-esteem.
Fran Lebowitz
To me, O'Hara is the real Fitzgerald.
Fran Lebowitz
Life is something to do when you can't get to sleep.
Fran Lebowitz
The opposite of talking isn't listening. The opposite of talking is waiting.
Fran Lebowitz
Inhabitants of underdeveloped nations and victims of natural disasters are the only people who have ever been happy to see soybeans.
Fran Lebowitz
I've never seen the Kardashians I'm not sure who they are. But I know a lot about them because it's impossible not to.
Fran Lebowitz
A dog who thinks he is a man's best friend is a dog who obviously has never met a tax lawyer.
Fran Lebowitz
Humility is no substitute for a good personality.
Fran Lebowitz
While clothes with pictures and/or writing on them are not entirely an invention of the modern age, they are an unpleasant indication of the general state of things. ... I mean, be realistic. If people don't want to listen to you, what makes you think they want to hear from your sweater?
Fran Lebowitz
I write a sentence a thousand times, changing it all the time to look at it in different ways.
Fran Lebowitz
