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It's the Government's job to print the money, deliver the mail and declare war. Now give me my cigarettes.

Florence King

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Florence King
Age: 80 †
Born: 1936
Born: January 5
Died: 2016
Died: January 6
Essayist
Journalist
Novelist
Washington
District of Columbia
Florence Virginia King
Mail
Print
War
Jobs
Money
Cigarettes
Give
Declare
Government
Cigarette
Giving
Deliver

More quotes by Florence King

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Insecurity breeds treachery: if you are kind to people who hate themselves, they will hate you as well.
Florence King
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We worship education but hate learning.
Florence King
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Families composed of rugged individualists have to do things obliquely.
Florence King
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People are so busy dreaming the American Dream, fantasizing about what they could be or have a right to be, that they're all asleep at the switch. Consequently we are living in the Age of Human Error.
Florence King
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America is the only country in the world where you can suffer culture shock without leaving home.
Florence King
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Writers who have nothing to say always strain for metaphors to say it in.
Florence King
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If you ever meet someone who cannot understand why solitary confinement is considered punishment, you have met a misanthrope.
Florence King
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because the theater lost a Barrymore every time a Southerner decided not to go on the stage, just about anything that comes out of a Southern mouth is bound to be a ringing line.
Florence King
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Southerners have a genius for psychological alchemy...If something intolerable simply cannot be changed, driven away or shot they will not only tolerate it but take pride in it as well.
Florence King
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My object is to live in a place that does not call itself 'the community with a heart.' I want one of those godforsaken towns where all the young people leave and the rest sit on the porch with a rifle across their knees.
Florence King
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Familiarity doesn't breed contempt, it is contempt.
Florence King
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Any discussion of the problems of being funny in America will not make sense unless we substitute the word wit for humor. Humor inspires sympathetic good-natured laughter and is favored by the healing-power gang. Wit goes for the jugular, not the jocular, and it's the opposite of football instead of building character, it tears it down.
Florence King
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Randian heroes come off as metaphors for Jews because they are beset by irrational forces that try to bar them from the professions and use their virtues against them to bring about their destruction.
Florence King
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A home without a grandmother is like an egg without salt.
Florence King
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Spinsterhood is Nature's Own Feminism.
Florence King
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Familiarity breeds democracry.
Florence King
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to a Southerner it is faux pas, not sins, that matter in this world.
Florence King
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Americans worship creativity the way they worship physical beauty - as a way of enjoying elitism without guilt: God did it.
Florence King
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Real feminism is spinsterhood. It's time America admitted that old maids give all women a good name.
Florence King
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There is nothing wrong with women's studies that studying the right women can't cure, but feminist literary scholars have a penchant for dragging the rivers of deserved obscurity for third-rate neurotics.
Florence King