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It must be a good thing to be good or ivrybody wudden't be pretendin' he was.

Finley Peter Dunne

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Finley Peter Dunne
Age: 68 †
Born: 1867
Born: July 10
Died: 1936
Died: April 24
Author
Journalist
Screenwriter
Writer
Chicago
Illinois
Must
Thing
Good
Hypocrisy

More quotes by Finley Peter Dunne

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One of the strangest things about life is that the poor, who need the money the most, are the ones that never have it.
Finley Peter Dunne
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Work is work if you're paid to do it, and it's a pleasure if you pay to be allowed to do it.
Finley Peter Dunne
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A man that'd expict to thrain lobsters to fly in a year is called a loonytic but a man that thinks men can be tur-rned into angels by an iliction is called a rayformer an' remains at large.
Finley Peter Dunne
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A game you play with your own worst enemy-yourself.
Finley Peter Dunne
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A man's idee in a card game is war
Finley Peter Dunne
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Histhry is a post-mortem examination. It tellsye what a counthry died iv. But I'd like to know what it lived iv.
Finley Peter Dunne
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No, sir, th' dimmycratic party ain't on speakin' terms with itsilf. Whin ye see two men with white neckties go into a sthreet car an' set in opposite corners while wan mutthers Thraiter an' th' other hisses Miscreent ye can bet they're two dimmycratic leaders thryin' to reunite th' gran' ol' party.
Finley Peter Dunne
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An appeal is when you ask one court to show its contempt for another court.
Finley Peter Dunne
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What is instinct? It is the natural tendency in one when filled with dismay to turn to his wife.
Finley Peter Dunne
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Many a man that could rule a hundherd millyon sthrangers with an ir'n hand is careful to take off his shoes in the front hallway whin he comes home late at night.
Finley Peter Dunne
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Stories are meant to comfort the afflicted, and afflict the comfortable.
Finley Peter Dunne
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You can lade a man up to th' university, but ye can't make him think.
Finley Peter Dunne
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A fanatic is a man that does what he thinks the Lord would do if He knew the facts of the case.
Finley Peter Dunne
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Drink never made a man better, but it has made many a man think he was better.
Finley Peter Dunne
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If a man is wise, he gets rich an' if he gets rich, he gets foolish, or his wife does. That's what keeps the money movin' around.
Finley Peter Dunne
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Viceis a creature of such heejous mienthat th' more ye see it th' betther ye like it.
Finley Peter Dunne
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Most vegetarians I ever see looked enough like their food to be classed as cannibals.
Finley Peter Dunne
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There's always wan encouragin' thing about th' sad scientific facts that come out ivrv week in th' pa-apers. They're usually not thrue.
Finley Peter Dunne
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It [Thanksgiving] was founded by the Puritans to give thanks for bein' preserved from the Indians, an' we keep it to give thanks we are preserved from the Puritans.
Finley Peter Dunne
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Vice goes along way towards making life bearable. A little vice now and then is relished by the best of men.
Finley Peter Dunne