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There's always wan encouragin' thing about th' sad scientific facts that come out ivrv week in th' pa-apers. They're usually not thrue.

Finley Peter Dunne

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Finley Peter Dunne
Age: 68 †
Born: 1867
Born: July 10
Died: 1936
Died: April 24
Author
Journalist
Screenwriter
Writer
Chicago
Illinois
Usually
Week
Science
Facts
Come
Thing
Always
Scientific

More quotes by Finley Peter Dunne

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That is, no matther whether th' constitution follows th' flag or not, th' supreme coort follows th' iliction returns.
Finley Peter Dunne
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Most vegetarians I ever see looked enough like their food to be classed as cannibals.
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The past always looks better than it was it's only pleasant because it isn't here.
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Viceis a creature of such heejous mienthat th' more ye see it th' betther ye like it.
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Work is work if you're paid to do it, and it's a pleasure if you pay to be allowed to do it.
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It don't make much difference what you study, so long as you don't like it.
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An appeal is when you ask one court to show its contempt for another court.
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Meditation is a gift confined to unknown philosophers and cows. Others don't begin to think till they begin to talk or write.
Finley Peter Dunne
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What's wan man's news is another man's throubles.
Finley Peter Dunne
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No, sir, th' dimmycratic party ain't on speakin' terms with itsilf. Whin ye see two men with white neckties go into a sthreet car an' set in opposite corners while wan mutthers Thraiter an' th' other hisses Miscreent ye can bet they're two dimmycratic leaders thryin' to reunite th' gran' ol' party.
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When 'tis an aven thing in th' prayin', may th' best man win ... an' th' best man will win.
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The wise people are in New York because the foolish went there first, that's the way the wise men make a living.
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One of the strangest things about life is that the poor, who need the money the most, are the ones that never have it.
Finley Peter Dunne
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A lie with a purpose is one of the worst kind, and the most profitable
Finley Peter Dunne
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Drink never made a man better, but it has made many a man think he was better.
Finley Peter Dunne
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Th' first thing to have in a libry is a shelf. Fr'm time to time this can be decorated with lithrachure. But th' shelf is th' main thing.
Finley Peter Dunne
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A man that'd expict to thrain lobsters to fly in a year is called a loonytic but a man that thinks men can be tur-rned into angels by an iliction is called a rayformer an' remains at large.
Finley Peter Dunne
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What is instinct? It is the natural tendency in one when filled with dismay to turn to his wife.
Finley Peter Dunne
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If ye live enough befure thirty ye won't care to live at all afther fifty.
Finley Peter Dunne
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A man's idee in a card game is war
Finley Peter Dunne