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There's always wan encouragin' thing about th' sad scientific facts that come out ivrv week in th' pa-apers. They're usually not thrue.
Finley Peter Dunne
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Finley Peter Dunne
Age: 68 †
Born: 1867
Born: July 10
Died: 1936
Died: April 24
Author
Journalist
Screenwriter
Writer
Chicago
Illinois
Science
Facts
Come
Thing
Always
Scientific
Usually
Week
More quotes by Finley Peter Dunne
I wonder why you can always read a doctor's bill and you can never read his prescription.
Finley Peter Dunne
You can lade a man up to th' university, but ye can't make him think.
Finley Peter Dunne
Th' first thing to have in a libry is a shelf. Fr'm time to time this can be decorated with lithrachure. But th' shelf is th' main thing.
Finley Peter Dunne
Most vegetarians I ever see looked enough like their food to be classed as cannibals.
Finley Peter Dunne
Viceis a creature of such heejous mienthat th' more ye see it th' betther ye like it.
Finley Peter Dunne
Many a man that couldn't direct ye to th' drug store on th' corner when he was thirty will get a respectful hearin' when age has further impaired his mind.
Finley Peter Dunne
The past always looks better than it was it's only pleasant because it isn't here.
Finley Peter Dunne
What's wan man's news is another man's throubles.
Finley Peter Dunne
If Christian scientists had more science and doctors more Christianity, it wouldn't make any difference which you called in - if you had a good nurse.
Finley Peter Dunne
Many a man that could rule a hundherd millyon sthrangers with an ir'n hand is careful to take off his shoes in the front hallway whin he comes home late at night.
Finley Peter Dunne
Work is work if you're paid to do it, and it's a pleasure if you pay to be allowed to do it.
Finley Peter Dunne
What is instinct? It is the natural tendency in one when filled with dismay to turn to his wife.
Finley Peter Dunne
It don't make much difference what you study, so long as you don't like it.
Finley Peter Dunne
A game you play with your own worst enemy-yourself.
Finley Peter Dunne
No, sir, th' dimmycratic party ain't on speakin' terms with itsilf. Whin ye see two men with white neckties go into a sthreet car an' set in opposite corners while wan mutthers Thraiter an' th' other hisses Miscreent ye can bet they're two dimmycratic leaders thryin' to reunite th' gran' ol' party.
Finley Peter Dunne
It [Thanksgiving] was founded by the Puritans to give thanks for bein' preserved from the Indians, an' we keep it to give thanks we are preserved from the Puritans.
Finley Peter Dunne
I care not who makes th' laws iv a nation, if I can get out an injunction.
Finley Peter Dunne
It must be a good thing to be good or ivrybody wudden't be pretendin' he was.
Finley Peter Dunne
A fanatic is a man that does what he thinks the Lord would do if He knew the facts of the case.
Finley Peter Dunne
One of the strangest things about life is that the poor, who need the money the most, are the ones that never have it.
Finley Peter Dunne