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A man that'd expict to thrain lobsters to fly in a year is called a loonytic but a man that thinks men can be tur-rned into angels by an iliction is called a rayformer an' remains at large.

Finley Peter Dunne

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Finley Peter Dunne
Age: 68 †
Born: 1867
Born: July 10
Died: 1936
Died: April 24
Author
Journalist
Screenwriter
Writer
Chicago
Illinois
Remains
Called
Year
Lobsters
Political
Lobster
Years
Angels
Men
Thinks
Thinking
Angel
Large

More quotes by Finley Peter Dunne

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I care not who makes th' laws iv a nation, if I can get out an injunction.
Finley Peter Dunne
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It don't make much difference what you study, so long as you don't like it.
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The past always looks better than it was it's only pleasant because it isn't here.
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A man's idee in a card game is war
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Work is work if you're paid to do it, and it's a pleasure if you pay to be allowed to do it.
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You can lade a man up to th' university, but ye can't make him think.
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Meditation is a gift confined to unknown philosophers and cows. Others don't begin to think till they begin to talk or write.
Finley Peter Dunne
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There's always wan encouragin' thing about th' sad scientific facts that come out ivrv week in th' pa-apers. They're usually not thrue.
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To most people a savage nation is wan that doesn't wear oncomf'rtable clothes.
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Vice goes along way towards making life bearable. A little vice now and then is relished by the best of men.
Finley Peter Dunne
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What's wan man's news is another man's throubles.
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Freedom is like drink. If you take any at all, you might as well take enough to make you happy for a while.
Finley Peter Dunne
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High finance isn't burglary or obtaining money by false pretenses, but rather a judicious selection from the best features of those fine arts.
Finley Peter Dunne
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A fanatic is a man that does what he thinks the Lord would do if He knew the facts of the case.
Finley Peter Dunne
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Many a man that could rule a hundherd millyon sthrangers with an ir'n hand is careful to take off his shoes in the front hallway whin he comes home late at night.
Finley Peter Dunne
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If a man is wise, he gets rich an' if he gets rich, he gets foolish, or his wife does. That's what keeps the money movin' around.
Finley Peter Dunne
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A rayformer thinks he was ilicted because he was a rayformer, whin th thruth iv th matther is he was ilicted because no wan knew him.
Finley Peter Dunne
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Many a man that couldn't direct ye to th' drug store on th' corner when he was thirty will get a respectful hearin' when age has further impaired his mind.
Finley Peter Dunne
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No, sir, th' dimmycratic party ain't on speakin' terms with itsilf. Whin ye see two men with white neckties go into a sthreet car an' set in opposite corners while wan mutthers Thraiter an' th' other hisses Miscreent ye can bet they're two dimmycratic leaders thryin' to reunite th' gran' ol' party.
Finley Peter Dunne
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Th' first thing to have in a libry is a shelf. Fr'm time to time this can be decorated with lithrachure. But th' shelf is th' main thing.
Finley Peter Dunne