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A man that'd expict to thrain lobsters to fly in a year is called a loonytic but a man that thinks men can be tur-rned into angels by an iliction is called a rayformer an' remains at large.

Finley Peter Dunne

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Finley Peter Dunne
Age: 68 †
Born: 1867
Born: July 10
Died: 1936
Died: April 24
Author
Journalist
Screenwriter
Writer
Chicago
Illinois
Year
Lobsters
Political
Lobster
Years
Angels
Men
Thinks
Thinking
Angel
Large
Remains
Called

More quotes by Finley Peter Dunne

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There's always wan encouragin' thing about th' sad scientific facts that come out ivrv week in th' pa-apers. They're usually not thrue.
Finley Peter Dunne
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A game you play with your own worst enemy-yourself.
Finley Peter Dunne
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A rayformer thinks he was ilicted because he was a rayformer, whin th thruth iv th matther is he was ilicted because no wan knew him.
Finley Peter Dunne
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Freedom is like drink. If you take any at all, you might as well take enough to make you happy for a while.
Finley Peter Dunne
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That is, no matther whether th' constitution follows th' flag or not, th' supreme coort follows th' iliction returns.
Finley Peter Dunne
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A man's idee in a card game is war
Finley Peter Dunne
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If Christian scientists had more science and doctors more Christianity, it wouldn't make any difference which you called in - if you had a good nurse.
Finley Peter Dunne
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What is instinct? It is the natural tendency in one when filled with dismay to turn to his wife.
Finley Peter Dunne
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An appeal is when you ask one court to show its contempt for another court.
Finley Peter Dunne
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A fanatic is a man that does what he thinks the Lord would do if He knew the facts of the case.
Finley Peter Dunne
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Viceis a creature of such heejous mienthat th' more ye see it th' betther ye like it.
Finley Peter Dunne
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The wise people are in New York because the foolish went there first, that's the way the wise men make a living.
Finley Peter Dunne
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When the American people get through with the English language, it will look as if it had been run over by a musical comedy.
Finley Peter Dunne
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Th' first thing to have in a libry is a shelf. Fr'm time to time this can be decorated with lithrachure. But th' shelf is th' main thing.
Finley Peter Dunne
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Meditation is a gift confined to unknown philosophers and cows. Others don't begin to think till they begin to talk or write.
Finley Peter Dunne
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To most people a savage nation is wan that doesn't wear oncomf'rtable clothes.
Finley Peter Dunne
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One of the strangest things about life is that the poor, who need the money the most, are the ones that never have it.
Finley Peter Dunne
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Work is work if you're paid to do it, and it's a pleasure if you pay to be allowed to do it.
Finley Peter Dunne
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Opportunity knocks at every man's door once. On some men's door it hammers till it breaks down the door and then it goes in and wakes him up if he's asleep, and ever afterward it works for him as a night watchman.
Finley Peter Dunne
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Histhry is a post-mortem examination. It tellsye what a counthry died iv. But I'd like to know what it lived iv.
Finley Peter Dunne