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The only good husbands stay bachelors: They're too considerate to get married.
Finley Peter Dunne
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Finley Peter Dunne
Age: 68 †
Born: 1867
Born: July 10
Died: 1936
Died: April 24
Author
Journalist
Screenwriter
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Chicago
Illinois
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Marriage
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Husband
More quotes by Finley Peter Dunne
Don't jump on a man unless he is down.
Finley Peter Dunne
An appeal is when you ask one court to show its contempt for another court.
Finley Peter Dunne
No, sir, th' dimmycratic party ain't on speakin' terms with itsilf. Whin ye see two men with white neckties go into a sthreet car an' set in opposite corners while wan mutthers Thraiter an' th' other hisses Miscreent ye can bet they're two dimmycratic leaders thryin' to reunite th' gran' ol' party.
Finley Peter Dunne
It must be a good thing to be good or ivrybody wudden't be pretendin' he was.
Finley Peter Dunne
A fanatic is a man that does what he thinks the Lord would do if He knew the facts of the case.
Finley Peter Dunne
One of the strangest things about life is that the poor, who need the money the most, are the ones that never have it.
Finley Peter Dunne
What's wan man's news is another man's throubles.
Finley Peter Dunne
A man that'd expict to thrain lobsters to fly in a year is called a loonytic but a man that thinks men can be tur-rned into angels by an iliction is called a rayformer an' remains at large.
Finley Peter Dunne
If Christian scientists had more science and doctors more Christianity, it wouldn't make any difference which you called in - if you had a good nurse.
Finley Peter Dunne
Vice is a creature of such hideous mien... that the more you see it the better you like it
Finley Peter Dunne
Viceis a creature of such heejous mienthat th' more ye see it th' betther ye like it.
Finley Peter Dunne
What is instinct? It is the natural tendency in one when filled with dismay to turn to his wife.
Finley Peter Dunne
When 'tis an aven thing in th' prayin', may th' best man win ... an' th' best man will win.
Finley Peter Dunne
High finance isn't burglary or obtaining money by false pretenses, but rather a judicious selection from the best features of those fine arts.
Finley Peter Dunne
A lie with a purpose is one of the worst kind, and the most profitable
Finley Peter Dunne
The wise people are in New York because the foolish went there first, that's the way the wise men make a living.
Finley Peter Dunne
It don't make much difference what you study, so long as you don't like it.
Finley Peter Dunne
I niver knew a pollytician to go wrong ontil he's been contaminated by contact with a business man.
Finley Peter Dunne
Most vegetarians I ever see looked enough like their food to be classed as cannibals.
Finley Peter Dunne
That is, no matther whether th' constitution follows th' flag or not, th' supreme coort follows th' iliction returns.
Finley Peter Dunne
