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The only good husbands stay bachelors: They're too considerate to get married.
Finley Peter Dunne
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Finley Peter Dunne
Age: 68 †
Born: 1867
Born: July 10
Died: 1936
Died: April 24
Author
Journalist
Screenwriter
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Chicago
Illinois
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More quotes by Finley Peter Dunne
A lie with a purpose is one of the worst kind, and the most profitable
Finley Peter Dunne
If ye live enough befure thirty ye won't care to live at all afther fifty.
Finley Peter Dunne
When the American people get through with the English language, it will look as if it had been run over by a musical comedy.
Finley Peter Dunne
A game you play with your own worst enemy-yourself.
Finley Peter Dunne
Histhry is a post-mortem examination. It tellsye what a counthry died iv. But I'd like to know what it lived iv.
Finley Peter Dunne
I wonder why you can always read a doctor's bill and you can never read his prescription.
Finley Peter Dunne
The wise people are in New York because the foolish went there first, that's the way the wise men make a living.
Finley Peter Dunne
That is, no matther whether th' constitution follows th' flag or not, th' supreme coort follows th' iliction returns.
Finley Peter Dunne
Work is work if you're paid to do it, and it's a pleasure if you pay to be allowed to do it.
Finley Peter Dunne
Opportunity knocks at every man's door once. On some men's door it hammers till it breaks down the door and then it goes in and wakes him up if he's asleep, and ever afterward it works for him as a night watchman.
Finley Peter Dunne
A fanatic is a man that does what he thinks the Lord would do if He knew the facts of the case.
Finley Peter Dunne
You can lade a man up to th' university, but ye can't make him think.
Finley Peter Dunne
Viceis a creature of such heejous mienthat th' more ye see it th' betther ye like it.
Finley Peter Dunne
Meditation is a gift confined to unknown philosophers and cows. Others don't begin to think till they begin to talk or write.
Finley Peter Dunne
One of the strangest things about life is that the poor, who need the money the most, are the ones that never have it.
Finley Peter Dunne
If Christian scientists had more science and doctors more Christianity, it wouldn't make any difference which you called in - if you had a good nurse.
Finley Peter Dunne
To most people a savage nation is wan that doesn't wear oncomf'rtable clothes.
Finley Peter Dunne
High finance isn't burglary or obtaining money by false pretenses, but rather a judicious selection from the best features of those fine arts.
Finley Peter Dunne
A rayformer thinks he was ilicted because he was a rayformer, whin th thruth iv th matther is he was ilicted because no wan knew him.
Finley Peter Dunne
What is instinct? It is the natural tendency in one when filled with dismay to turn to his wife.
Finley Peter Dunne
