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The only good husbands stay bachelors: They're too considerate to get married.
Finley Peter Dunne
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Finley Peter Dunne
Age: 68 †
Born: 1867
Born: July 10
Died: 1936
Died: April 24
Author
Journalist
Screenwriter
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Chicago
Illinois
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More quotes by Finley Peter Dunne
If Christian scientists had more science and doctors more Christianity, it wouldn't make any difference which you called in - if you had a good nurse.
Finley Peter Dunne
Drink never made a man better, but it has made many a man think he was better.
Finley Peter Dunne
Vice is a creature of such hideous mien... that the more you see it the better you like it
Finley Peter Dunne
Opportunity knocks at every man's door once. On some men's door it hammers till it breaks down the door and then it goes in and wakes him up if he's asleep, and ever afterward it works for him as a night watchman.
Finley Peter Dunne
Many a man that could rule a hundherd millyon sthrangers with an ir'n hand is careful to take off his shoes in the front hallway whin he comes home late at night.
Finley Peter Dunne
An appeal is when you ask one court to show its contempt for another court.
Finley Peter Dunne
The wise people are in New York because the foolish went there first, that's the way the wise men make a living.
Finley Peter Dunne
Vice goes along way towards making life bearable. A little vice now and then is relished by the best of men.
Finley Peter Dunne
Work is work if you're paid to do it, and it's a pleasure if you pay to be allowed to do it.
Finley Peter Dunne
What's wan man's news is another man's throubles.
Finley Peter Dunne
A fanatic is a man that does what he thinks the Lord would do if He knew the facts of the case.
Finley Peter Dunne
One of the strangest things about life is that the poor, who need the money the most, are the ones that never have it.
Finley Peter Dunne
That is, no matther whether th' constitution follows th' flag or not, th' supreme coort follows th' iliction returns.
Finley Peter Dunne
If a man is wise, he gets rich an' if he gets rich, he gets foolish, or his wife does. That's what keeps the money movin' around.
Finley Peter Dunne
High finance isn't burglary or obtaining money by false pretenses, but rather a judicious selection from the best features of those fine arts.
Finley Peter Dunne
Stories are meant to comfort the afflicted, and afflict the comfortable.
Finley Peter Dunne
It [Thanksgiving] was founded by the Puritans to give thanks for bein' preserved from the Indians, an' we keep it to give thanks we are preserved from the Puritans.
Finley Peter Dunne
Viceis a creature of such heejous mienthat th' more ye see it th' betther ye like it.
Finley Peter Dunne
It don't make much difference what you study, so long as you don't like it.
Finley Peter Dunne
You can lade a man up to th' university, but ye can't make him think.
Finley Peter Dunne
