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All work and no pay makes a housewife.

Evan Esar

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Evan Esar
Age: 95 †
Born: 1899
Born: January 1
Died: 1995
Died: January 1
American Humorist
Humorist
Housewife
Pay
Makes
Work

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Diets show to what great lengths women will go so as not to go to great widths.
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Life is a game played on us while we are playing other games.
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The girl with a future avoids a man with a past.
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Times change: it was once the custom to take a bath weekly and religion daily.
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The computer saves man a lot of guesswork, but so does the bikini.
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Walking isn't a lost art: one must, by some means, get to the garage.
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A creature that never cries over spilt milk: a cat.
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Hard work never hurt anyone who hired someone else to do it.
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Corrupt officials are usually close-mouthed and open-handed.
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The best time to give advice to your children is while they're still young enough to believe you know what you're talking about.
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A good loser is all right, but it isn't so much fun to beat him.
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If you want to know how little your dignity is worth, take it to the pawnbroker.
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A wedding is the formality a man has to go through before going to work for a new boss.
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Washington is the place where nobody believes a rumor until it has been officially denied.
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A lazy man's wife is generally the power behind the drone.
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[A mathematician is a] scientist who can figure out anything except such simple things as squaring the circle and trisecting an angle.
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Laugh and the world laughs with you cry -- and the world laughs harder.
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Some people worry because they are in debt others, because they can't even get in.
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Many a woman would get a divorce if she could do it without making her husband happy.
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There are two kinds of leaders: those who are interested in the flock, and those who are interested in the fleece.
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