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A wedding is the formality a man has to go through before going to work for a new boss.

Evan Esar

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Evan Esar
Age: 95 †
Born: 1899
Born: January 1
Died: 1995
Died: January 1
American Humorist
Humorist
Formality
Wedding
Boss
Going
Work
Men

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There are two kinds of leaders: those who are interested in the flock, and those who are interested in the fleece.
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Canada's climate is nine months winter and three months late in the fall.
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Don't tear your hair out over a woman it'll be harder to attract the next one if you're bald.
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Some taxpayers close their eyes, some stop their ears, some shut their mouths, but all pay through the nose.
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Many a man who goes to Las Vegas to get away from it all soon finds that Las Vegas gets it all away from him.
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An epigram is the marriage of wit and wisdom a wisecrack, their divorce.
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Some people blow their top, but all people blow their bottom.
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The best way to spoil a good story is by sticking to the facts.
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An instrument that sometimes expresses thought, sometimes obscures thought, but most often replaces thought.
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Communism is a form of society where the less people have to eat, the more they have to swallow.
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The quizzical expression of the monkey at the zoo comes from his wondering whether he is his brother's keeper, or his keeper's brother.
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The modern dance is no dance in the first place, and when you've finally learned it, it's not modern any more.
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All things come to him who waits, but they are mostly leftovers from those who didn't wait.
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Bureaucracy is more people doing less things, and taking more time to do them worse.
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The only time a lazy man ever succeeds is when he tries to do nothing.
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The only thing worse than being on the wrong side of an argument is to be on the right side with no one listening.
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If you want to know how little your dignity is worth, take it to the pawnbroker.
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All men are created equal and endowed by their Creator with a mighty urge to become otherwise.
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The only way to cure an egotist from bragging is by surgery--amputation at the neck.
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Conceit is a disease That the doctors got no cure They've done a lot of research on it But what it is, they're still not sure.
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