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The only place where you can find equality is in the cemetery.

Evan Esar

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Evan Esar
Age: 95 †
Born: 1899
Born: January 1
Died: 1995
Died: January 1
American Humorist
Humorist
Cemetery
Equality
Place
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A home in the country is what a city man hopes to buy and a farmer hopes to sell.
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Admiration: Our feeling of delight that another person resembles us.
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Reactionary: One who wants the rules enforced so nobody can take his pile away from him the way he got it from others.
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Bureaucracy is more people doing less things, and taking more time to do them worse.
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Zoo: An excellent place to study the habits of human beings.
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All things come to him who waits, but they are mostly leftovers from those who didn't wait.
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Play: Work that you enjoy doing for nothing.
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An actor is a man with an infinite capacity for taking praise.
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A dollar saved is a dollar earned but seldom vice versa.
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Life is a game played on us while we are playing other games.
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A creature that never cries over spilt milk: a cat.
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Etymology: from Latin ad-, to + visum, past participle of videre, to see. Advice is what you get from your parents when you are growing up, and from your children when you are growing old.
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A good loser is all right, but it isn't so much fun to beat him.
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An epigram is the marriage of wit and wisdom a wisecrack, their divorce.
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If you want to be successful, you must either have a chance or take one.
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After paying for the wedding, about the only thing a father has left to give away is the bride.
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Many a husband lives to regret the extravagant fee he bestowed upon the minister who sentenced him.
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A dictator's chief problem is keeping the stomachs of his subjects full while keeping their heads empty.
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With a braggart, it's no sooner done than said.
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Diets show to what great lengths women will go so as not to go to great widths.
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