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If you want to know how little your dignity is worth, take it to the pawnbroker.

Evan Esar

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Evan Esar
Age: 95 †
Born: 1899
Born: January 1
Died: 1995
Died: January 1
American Humorist
Humorist
Dignity
Worth
Littles
Little
Take

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Don't tear your hair out over a woman it'll be harder to attract the next one if you're bald.
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A homosexual is the only man who ever meets a man he would like to marry if he were a woman.
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Corrupt officials are usually close-mouthed and open-handed.
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Some taxpayers close their eyes, some stop their ears, some shut their mouths, but all pay through the nose.
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The best way to make a long story short is to stop listening.
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The modern dance is no dance in the first place, and when you've finally learned it, it's not modern any more.
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Nowadays it's not who wears the pants in the family, but who carries the credit cards.
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Communism is a form of society where the less people have to eat, the more they have to swallow.
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More diets start in dress shops than in doctors' offices.
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Etymology: from Latin ad-, to + visum, past participle of videre, to see. Advice is what you get from your parents when you are growing up, and from your children when you are growing old.
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It's surprising how much wisdom every man possesses -- if not for his own affairs, then for the affairs of others.
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All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy - and Jill a wealthy widow.
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A signature always reveals a man's character - and sometimes even his name.
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In elections, the undecided vote is usually the deciding factor.
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The only time a lazy man ever succeeds is when he tries to do nothing.
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Washington is the place where nobody believes a rumor until it has been officially denied.
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The secret of successful writing lies in striking the right keys on the typewriter.
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A creature that never cries over spilt milk: a cat.
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Adam and Eve were the first of all unions to defy management.
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