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More diets start in dress shops than in doctors' offices.

Evan Esar

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Evan Esar
Age: 95 †
Born: 1899
Born: January 1
Died: 1995
Died: January 1
American Humorist
Humorist
Dresses
Doctors
Office
Start
Offices
Shops
Diets
Dress

More quotes by Evan Esar

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[A mathematician is a] scientist who can figure out anything except such simple things as squaring the circle and trisecting an angle.
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A hamburger by any other name costs twice as much.
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A corporation has all the powers and privileges of an individual: all it lacks is a conscience.
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All things come to him who waits, but they are mostly leftovers from those who didn't wait.
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If you want to be successful, you must either have a chance or take one.
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All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy - and Jill a wealthy widow.
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The quizzical expression of the monkey at the zoo comes from his wondering whether he is his brother's keeper, or his keeper's brother.
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The best way to spoil a good story is by sticking to the facts.
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[Statistics] The science that can prove everything except the usefulness of statistics.
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Corrupt officials are usually close-mouthed and open-handed.
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A homosexual is the only man who ever meets a man he would like to marry if he were a woman.
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After paying for the wedding, about the only thing a father has left to give away is the bride.
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A good loser is all right, but it isn't so much fun to beat him.
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Diets show to what great lengths women will go so as not to go to great widths.
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The girl with a future avoids a man with a past.
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The only medicine that needs no prescription, has no unpleasant taste, and costs no money is laughter.
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With a braggart, it's no sooner done than said.
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The only thing worse than being on the wrong side of an argument is to be on the right side with no one listening.
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The only place where you can find equality is in the cemetery.
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A cynic sees little to admire in the world, while the world sees even less to admire in him.
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