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A girl never cares who casts the first stone at her -- as long as it's a diamond

Evan Esar

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Evan Esar
Age: 95 †
Born: 1899
Born: January 1
Died: 1995
Died: January 1
American Humorist
Humorist
Firsts
First
Diamond
Long
Cares
Never
Stone
Casts
Stones
Girl
Care

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There's only one kind of common sense but a thousand varieties of stupidity.
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The lecturer who is full of his subject is usually very slow in emptying himself.
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Admiration: Our feeling of delight that another person resembles us.
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Congress would give the people what they wanted if the people knew what they wanted, and if Congress could give it to them.
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Many a man who goes to Las Vegas to get away from it all soon finds that Las Vegas gets it all away from him.
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All things come to him who waits, but they are mostly leftovers from those who didn't wait.
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The car was invented as a convenient place to sit out traffic jams
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The only time a lazy man ever succeeds is when he tries to do nothing.
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A cynic sees little to admire in the world, while the world sees even less to admire in him.
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If you want to be successful, you must either have a chance or take one.
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All men are created equal and endowed by their Creator with a mighty urge to become otherwise.
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Zoo: An excellent place to study the habits of human beings.
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Divorce is the key that opens the strongbox where the bonds of matrimony are kept under wedlock.
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With a braggart, it's no sooner done than said.
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Bureaucracy is more people doing less things, and taking more time to do them worse.
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Charm is to a woman what perfume is to a flower.
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A dollar saved is a dollar earned but seldom vice versa.
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A homosexual is the only man who ever meets a man he would like to marry if he were a woman.
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