We have to recognise that the validation of identity comes through relationships we have and what we produce.

A balance is necessary in life. To achieve this we must move away from broad definitions of workplaces as functional and households as emotional. Similarly, home, the haven in a heartless world, as defined by men, cannot be used by them as an antidote to the workplace's discomforts and demands, if this means having the wife as a servicer.

Trust is essential for our social wellbeing. Without trusting the good will of others we retreat into bureaucracy, rules and demands for more law and order. Trust is based on positive experiences with other people an it grows with use. We need to trust that others are going be basically reasonable beings.

The agencies are the Walmarts of the welfare agency