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Virtual sex, no matter how realistic, was really nothing but glorified, computer-assisted masturbation.

Ernest Cline

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Ernest Cline
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: March 29
Blogger
Comedian
Journalist
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Ashland
Ohio
Ernest Christy Cline
Computer
Nothing
Matter
Assisted
Really
Glorified
Masturbation
Virtual
Realistic
Sex

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I created the OASIS because I never felt at home in the real world. I didn't know how to connect with the people there.
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You were born at a pretty crappy time in history. And it looks like things are only gonna get worse from here on out.
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I've heard Stephen King say that when you write a novel you end up revealing everything about yourself.
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I felt like a kid standing in the world's greatest video arcade without any quarters, unable to do anything but walk around and watch the other kids play.
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I never ran out of ammo, because each time I fired a round, a new round was teleported into the bottom of the clip. My bullet bill this month was going to be huge.
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...now that everyone could vote from home, via the OASIS, the only people who could get elected were movie stars, reality TV personalities, or radical televangelists.
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I watched a lot of YouTube videos of cute geeky girls playing '80s cover tunes on ukuleles. Technically, this wasn't part of my research, but I had a serious cute-geeky-girls-playing-ukuleles fetish that I can neither explain nor defend.
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I was watching a collection of vintage '80s cereal commercials when I paused to wonder why cereal manufacturers no longer included toy prizes inside every box. It was a tragedy, in my opinion. Another sign that civilization was going straight down the tubes.
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You’re evil, you know that?” I said. She grinned and shook her head. “Chaotic Neutral, sugar.
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As far as my house, I have a ton of video games and three or four old consoles.
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I notice when I'm at a party where I don't know anybody - even if I have nothing in common with somebody - we can still talk because we were raised by the same TV and cartoons and movies.
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Continue your quest by taking the test. Yes, but what test? What test was I supposed to take? The Kobayashi Maru? The Pepsi Challenge? Could the clue have been any more vague?
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I've never really collected anything other than old Atari cartridges. I only had, like, 12 Atari games as a kid, so at some point in my 20s I decided I was going to own all of them.
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Whenever I saw the sun, I reminded myself that I was looking at a star. One of over a hundred billion in our galaxy. A galaxy that was just one of billions of other galaxies in the observable universe. This helped me keep things in perspective.
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I've retroactively made all that wasted time rotting my brain into research. It makes me a hypocrite when I try to tell my own daughter, I don't know, I think we've played a little too much Mario.
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It's so much better to hand over a finished book than having all these people waiting.
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I burned through all of my extra lives in a matter of minutes, and my two least-favorite words appeared on the screen: GAME OVER.
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The clans began to bombard the outer force field with rockets, missiles, nukes, and harsh language.
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Being human totally sucks most of the time. Videogames are the only thing that make life bearable.
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Going outside is highly overrated.
Ernest Cline