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It is difficult to single out one sport over another, but if I have to name one in my separation suit, it will undoubtedly be football.

Erma Bombeck

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Erma Bombeck
Age: 69 †
Born: 1927
Born: February 21
Died: 1996
Died: April 22
Column Author
Journalist
Writer
Bellbrook
Ohio
Erma Louise Bombeck
Another
Suits
Sport
Football
Single
Name
Sports
Undoubtedly
Names
Suit
Difficult
Separation

More quotes by Erma Bombeck

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When the going gets tough, the tough make cookies.
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Before we sent kids to computer camps and told them they were having a good time, there was imagination among the human species.
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I've always felt there are two things a woman should never do after the age of thirty-five: stand in natural light and have a baby.
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I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage.
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A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat. A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday. A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend -- and he's a priest.
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Who in their infinite wisdom decreed that Little League uniforms be white? Certainly not a mother.
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Kids need love the most when they're acting most unlovable.
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I'm real ambivalent about [working mothers]. Those of use who have been in the women's movement for a long time know that we've talked a good game of go out and fulfill your dreams and be everything you were meant to be. But by the same token, we want daughters-in-law who are going to stay home and raise our grandchildren.
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You have to love a nation that celebrates its independence every July 4, not with a parade of guns, tanks, and soldiers who file by the White House in a show of strength and muscle, but with family picnics where kids throw Frisbees, the potato salad gets iffy, and the flies die from happiness. You may think you have overeaten, but it is patriotism.
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Why would anyone steal a shopping cart? It's like stealing a two-year-old.
Erma Bombeck
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I don't know when pepper mills in a restaurant got to be right behind frankincense and myrrh in prominence. It used to be in a little jar that sat next to the salt on the table and everyone passed it around, sneezed, and it was no big deal.
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Phone are wonderful instruments, but I wouldn't want our daughter to marry one.
Erma Bombeck
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My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint.
Erma Bombeck
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Encourage independence in your children by regularly losing them in the supermarket.
Erma Bombeck
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Maybe age is kinder to us than we think. With my bad eyes, I can't see how bad I look, and with my rotten memory, I have a good excuse for getting out of a lot of stuff.
Erma Bombeck
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The art of never making a mistake is crucial to motherhood. To be effective and to gain the respect she needs to function, a mother must have her children believe she has never engaged in sex, never made a bad decision, never caused her own mother a moment's anxiety, and was never a child.
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It is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding.
Erma Bombeck
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I have paid as much as $300 a night to throw up into a sink shaped like a seashell.
Erma Bombeck
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Motherhood isn't just a series of contractions it's a state of mind. From the moment we know life is inside us, we feel a responsibility to protect and defend that human being.
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With all the precautions and risks that accompany sex today, it sounds about as much fun as walking through a minefield.
Erma Bombeck