Quote

Our teen-agers withdrew to their bedrooms on their thirteenth birthday and didn't show themselves to us again until it was time to get married.

Erma Bombeck

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Erma Bombeck
Age: 69 †
Born: 1927
Born: February 21
Died: 1996
Died: April 22
Column Author
Journalist
Writer
Bellbrook
Ohio
Erma Louise Bombeck
Time
Teen
Adolescence
Bedroom
Birthday
Married
Agers
Show
Thirteenth
Shows
Withdrew
Didn
Bedrooms

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When children reach the age of sixteen, they discover the meaning of life: car keys.
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Housework, if you do it right, will kill you.
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When you leave them in the morning, they stick their nose in the door crack and stand there like a portrait until you turn the key eight hours later.
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Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery.
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I remember thinking how often we look, but never see ... we listen, but never hear ... we exist, but never feel. We take our relationships for granted. A house is only a place. It has no life of its own. It needs human voices, activity and laughter to come alive.
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House guests should be regarded as perishables: Leave them out too long and they go bad.
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I have a hat. It is graceful and feminine and give me a certain dignity, as if I were attending a state funeral or something. Someday I may get up enough courage to wear it, instead of carrying it.
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Let me put it this way. According to my girth, I should be a ninety-foot redwood.
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Adults can take a simple holiday for Children and screw it up. What began as a presentation of simple gifts to delight and surprise children around the Christmas tree has culminated in a woman unwrapping six shrimp forks from her dog, who drew her name.
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I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars.
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Women are never what they seem to be. There is the woman you see and there is the woman who is hidden. Buy the gift for the woman who is hidden.
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One meal a day is enough for a lion and would be for all of us if all we did all day was swat flies.
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I have seen my kid struggle into the kitchen in the morning with outfits that need only one accessory: an empty gin bottle.
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I have always felt that too much time was given before the birth, which is spent learning things like how to breathe in and out with your husband (I had my baby when they gave you a shot in the hip and you didn't wake up until the kid was ready to start school), and not enough time given to how to mother after the baby is born.
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I don't know when pepper mills in a restaurant got to be right behind frankincense and myrrh in prominence. It used to be in a little jar that sat next to the salt on the table and everyone passed it around, sneezed, and it was no big deal.
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I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage.
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Who in their infinite wisdom decreed that Little League uniforms be white? Certainly not a mother.
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It's [motherhood] the biggest on-the-job- training program in existence today.
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I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained, or the sofa faded.
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Shopping is a woman thing. It's a contact sport like football. Women enjoy the scrimmage, the noisy crowds, the danger of being trampled to death, and the ecstasy of the purchase.
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