Quote

Last year I gave seventy-four phone hours to soliciting baked goods for the Bake-A-Rama. I was named Top Call Girl by the League.

Erma Bombeck

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Erma Bombeck
Age: 69 †
Born: 1927
Born: February 21
Died: 1996
Died: April 22
Column Author
Journalist
Writer
Bellbrook
Ohio
Erma Louise Bombeck
Girl
Phones
Seventy
Years
Gave
Telephones
Four
Seventies
Call
Named
Year
Phone
Hours
Goods
Bake
Lasts
League
Baked
Last
Humorous
Rama

More quotes by Erma Bombeck

Image
You have to love a nation that celebrates its independence every July 4, not with a parade of guns, tanks, and soldiers who file by the White House in a show of strength and muscle, but with family picnics where kids throw Frisbees, the potato salad gets iffy, and the flies die from happiness. You may think you have overeaten, but it is patriotism.
Erma Bombeck
Image
I didn't fear old age. I was just becoming increasingly aware of the fact that the only people who said old age was beautiful were usually twenty-three years old.
Erma Bombeck
Image
Bombeck's Rug Rule: an ugly carpet will last for ever.
Erma Bombeck
Image
I originate from a family where sauce is viewed as a refreshment.
Erma Bombeck
Image
There is so much to teach, and the time goes so fast.
Erma Bombeck
Image
Occasionally, once a speaker is on his feet, it is difficult to get him to sit down. ... If and when he returns to earth, he notices half of the room is paging the other half and a few are playing with the melted candles.
Erma Bombeck
Image
If you can't make it better, you can laugh at it.
Erma Bombeck
Image
The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.
Erma Bombeck
Image
When the going gets tough, the tough make cookies.
Erma Bombeck
Image
Poached eggs are good, poached animals are not.
Erma Bombeck
Image
I have paid as much as $300 a night to throw up into a sink shaped like a seashell.
Erma Bombeck
Image
I was too old for a paper route, too young for Social Security and too tired for an affair.
Erma Bombeck
Image
You become about as exciting as your food blender. The kids come in, look you in the eye, and ask if anybody's home.
Erma Bombeck
Image
not all bears have their own television series. Some of them are unemployed wild animals.
Erma Bombeck
Image
My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car.
Erma Bombeck
Image
Most women put off entertaining until the kids are grown.
Erma Bombeck
Image
There are few things in this world more satisfying than having your son teach you how to play tennis, unless it is having a semi-truck run over your foot.
Erma Bombeck
Image
I have seen my kid struggle into the kitchen in the morning with outfits that need only one accessory: an empty gin bottle.
Erma Bombeck
Image
Somewhere it is written that parents who are critical of other people's children and publicly admit they can do better are asking for it.
Erma Bombeck
Image
Myths that need clarification: Everyone in California lives on a white, sandy beach. False. The only people who live on California beaches are vacationers from Arizona, Utah, and Nevada who own condos.
Erma Bombeck