Quote

Last year I gave seventy-four phone hours to soliciting baked goods for the Bake-A-Rama. I was named Top Call Girl by the League.

Erma Bombeck

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Erma Bombeck
Age: 69 †
Born: 1927
Born: February 21
Died: 1996
Died: April 22
Column Author
Journalist
Writer
Bellbrook
Ohio
Erma Louise Bombeck
Call
Named
Year
Phone
Hours
Goods
Bake
Lasts
League
Baked
Last
Humorous
Rama
Girl
Phones
Seventy
Years
Gave
Telephones
Four
Seventies

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I originate from a family where sauce is viewed as a refreshment.
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I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained, or the sofa faded.
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Early in my life I had made a pact with myself. I would never eat anything that moved when I cooked it, excited the dog, or inflated upon impact with my teeth.
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Some emotions don't make a lot of noise. It's hard to hear pride. Caring is real faint - like a heartbeat. And pure love - why, some days it's so quiet, you don't even know it's there.
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When the going gets tough, the tough make cookies.
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I will buy any creme, cosmetic, or elixir from a woman with a European accent.
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I firmly believe kids don't want your understanding. They want your trust, your compassion, your blinding love and your car keys, but you try to understand them and you're in big trouble.
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not all bears have their own television series. Some of them are unemployed wild animals.
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Have you any idea how many children it takes to turn off one light in the kitchen Three. It takes one to say What light and two more to say I didn't turn it on.
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Kids are without a doubt the most suspicious diners in the world. They will eat mud (raw or baked) rocks, paste, crayons, ball-point pens, moving goldfish, cigarette butts, and cat food. Try to coax a little beef stew into their mouths and they look at you like a puppy when you stand over him with the Sunday paper rolled up.
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If the nest is truly empty, who owns all this junk?
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Never order food in excess of your body weight.
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My sister and I never engaged in sibling rivalry. Our parents weren't that crazy about either one of us.
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I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage.
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Like religion, politics, and family planning, cereal is not a topic to be brought up in public. It's too controversial.
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There is only one thing harder in this world than forgiving. It's to ask forgiveness armed only with, 'I'm sorry'.
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Somewhere it is written that parents who are critical of other people's children and publicly admit they can do better are asking for it.
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It would have been a wonderful wedding - had it not been mine.
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What's with you men? Would hair stop growing on your chest if you asked directions somewhere?
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