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I convinced him his luggage had gone to that big Bermuda Triangle in the sky.

Erma Bombeck

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Erma Bombeck
Age: 69 †
Born: 1927
Born: February 21
Died: 1996
Died: April 22
Column Author
Journalist
Writer
Bellbrook
Ohio
Erma Louise Bombeck
Humor
Bermuda
Food
Triangle
Gone
Triangles
Funny
Luggage
Bigs
Airline
Humorous
Convinced
Sky

More quotes by Erma Bombeck

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Let us hope manufacturers can come up with a diaper that is environmentally sound. To go back to cloth would send us back to the day when breathing and raising a baby at the same time were incompatible.
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If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.
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Maybe age is kinder to us than we think. With my bad eyes, I can't see how bad I look, and with my rotten memory, I have a good excuse for getting out of a lot of stuff.
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Don't worry about who doesn't like you, who has more, or who's doing what.
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Early in my life I had made a pact with myself. I would never eat anything that moved when I cooked it, excited the dog, or inflated upon impact with my teeth.
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Dreams have only one owner at a time. That's why dreamers are lonely.
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The Rose Bowl is the only bowl I've ever seen that I didn't have to clean.
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My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car.
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Maybe you know why a child can reject a hot dog with mustard served on a soft bun at home, yet eat six of them two hours later at fifty cents each.
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A member of the committee slapped a name tag over my left bosom. What shall we name the other one? I smiled. She was not amused.
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Children make your life important.
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For years, my husband and I have advocated separate vacations. But the kids keep finding us.
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Let me put it this way. According to my girth, I should be a ninety-foot redwood.
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A kitchen without an ironing board? Are you kidding? It's un-American. It's like Simon without Garfunkel.
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I haven't trusted polls since I read that 62% of women had affairs during their lunch hour. I've never met a woman in my life who would give up lunch for sex.
Erma Bombeck
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The family. We are a strange little band of characters trudging through life sharing diseases and toothpaste, coveting one another's desserts, hiding shampoo, borrowing money, locking each other out of our rooms. . . and trying to figure out the common thread that bound us all together.
Erma Bombeck
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I lost everything in the post-natal depression.
Erma Bombeck
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Remember, you can lead a fifty-seven-year-old body to motherhood, but you can't make it stay awake.
Erma Bombeck
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Last year I gave seventy-four phone hours to soliciting baked goods for the Bake-A-Rama. I was named Top Call Girl by the League.
Erma Bombeck
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It's [motherhood] the biggest on-the-job- training program in existence today.
Erma Bombeck