Quote

Women are never what they seem to be. There is the woman you see and there is the woman who is hidden. Buy the gift for the woman who is hidden.

Erma Bombeck

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Erma Bombeck
Age: 69 †
Born: 1927
Born: February 21
Died: 1996
Died: April 22
Column Author
Journalist
Writer
Bellbrook
Ohio
Erma Louise Bombeck
Women
Never
Hidden
Gift
Seem
Woman
Seems

More quotes by Erma Bombeck

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Know the difference between success and fame. Success is Mother Teresa. Fame is Madonna.
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One son appears in stereo - a transistor in one ear and the phone in the other.
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Most women put off entertaining until the kids are grown.
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A grandparent will accept your calls from anywhere, collect.
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Maybe you know why a child can reject a hot dog with mustard served on a soft bun at home, yet eat six of them two hours later at fifty cents each.
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Before we sent kids to computer camps and told them they were having a good time, there was imagination among the human species.
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Volunteers are the only human beings on the face of the earth who reflect this nation's compassion, unselfish caring, patience, and just plain love for one another.
Erma Bombeck
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No self-respecting mother would run out of intimidations on the eve of a major holiday.
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Who in their infinite wisdom decreed that Little League uniforms be white? Certainly not a mother.
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It is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding.
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She's as funny as a toothache
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Have you any idea how many children it takes to turn off one light in the kitchen Three. It takes one to say What light and two more to say I didn't turn it on.
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All of a sudden, I feel very old and very tired. Maybe when I get to California, the smog, brush fires, floods, and earthquakes will cheer me up.
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I didn't fear old age. I was just becoming increasingly aware of the fact that the only people who said old age was beautiful were usually twenty-three years old.
Erma Bombeck
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My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car.
Erma Bombeck
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I do not participate in any sport with ambulances at the bottom of the hill.
Erma Bombeck
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Being a child at home alone in the summer is a high-risk occupation. If you call your mother at work thirteen times an hour, she can hurt you.
Erma Bombeck
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I have paid as much as $300 a night to throw up into a sink shaped like a seashell.
Erma Bombeck
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When it comes to cooking, five years ago I felt guilty just adding water. Now I want to bang the tube against the countertop and have a five-course meal pop out. If it comes with plastic silverware and a plate that self-destructs, all the better.
Erma Bombeck
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I have a hat. It is graceful and feminine and give me a certain dignity, as if I were attending a state funeral or something. Someday I may get up enough courage to wear it, instead of carrying it.
Erma Bombeck